[Kevin Kristopher]

I decided to do the No Contact thing 2 weeks ago so it has been 2 weeks since i have talked to my ex-girlfriend. The only thing i am worried about is the timing of the no contact. Me and my ex-gf both go to arizona state university an she lives in northern cali and i live in southern cali so now its summer and i decided to do the no contact thing when summer came along because then i wouldn't be able to see her which would make it a lot easier for me but now i am thinking if it was a good idea becuz i know she talks to some guy on the phone a lot and actually went to visit him in san diego on her way home to northern cali from arizona. she said nothing happened an he is just a friend but now since she doesn't have me to talk to she can easily just talk to him and me thinking about that makes me feel real sh*tty, so could i get some advice on what i should do. should i keep the no contact thing going, i dunno what i should do, help pleeeeeez!!!!

[magda]

Blah. You don't do the no-contact "thing" just to somehow win her back. You do the no-contact thing for you. The idea is that once you eliminate your need for her in your life she will no longer occupy your every obsessive impulse. Then, because she has no power over you, MAYBE she will be more attracted to you. But by that time whether or not that happens doesn't matter to you because you are over it. Basically, this summer, you are supposed to get a life that doesn't involve her. It hurts to think of her hanging out with Mr. San Diego? Ask your friends not to tell you that kind of information while you are trying to CUT HER OFF from your everyday consciousness.

Anyway, you don't mention her trying to call you. Trying to start talking to her a bunch is just going to make you look and feel pathetic.

[Kevin Kristopher]

but i want her back. i understand the no contact thing is to begin to eliminate her from my head but i would like to get her back and was doing the no contact thing to give her a chance to miss me and make me not push so hard cuz i now know that ex-girlfriends don't like that cuz it just pushes them more and more away. your so blunt with it

[magda]

your so blunt with it

Thank you *curtsy* I go for drama.

I know that's why you did the no-contact.. it just doesn't work that way, that's all. Youll have to get over it eventually. Tryin to help you avoid more heartache..

I hope someday you know completely what it's like to be loved by someone else like you're the best thing in the world. It just usually doesn't work out the way you think it should- when you think you need it most, ya know?