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NOT just about me, i forget it is about HIM too.
my boyfriend and i fought all week about this college get together and he wanted to go and i dd nt want to go to it (social phobia) and i did not want him to go without me (control issues), he was very mad at me (anger issues) and said some things about not being happy with our relatinship lately. I finally agreed to try the therapy and work on my social phobias and insecurity issues, and conversation skills. now, we got past this, we did not go to the party, so instead he said i owe him a night out. so last night we went out and we had a lot of fun. today another matter because he is very tired and so am i and we had to get up early to do things. so now today he is cranky and being a major big time butthead! so he bites my head off about things and mutters to himself behind my back and i do not know whathe is saying. he was bitching about this and that and the other thing and i just retreated to my computer and he to his news paper.
i got to thinking that this past week i had it all stuck in my head that everything was about me! that i had to change all this stuff and go to counseling and try harder and work on this and work on that while he sits there trying to look pretty as a picture?
huh uh, it don't fly with me. i had so quickly forgotten that there were/are other reasons i had wanted to leave this relationship as well, and that is becaue of things like today. you know i get tired too, but i do not bite his head off, or anyone elses either. i am sure he does not intend to be this way, he is just tired, yet i do take it ever so personally, and how can i NOT? so the problem is that he has problems too, and thinks that i am the only one who needs to get help here. i felt hopeful when i thought it was all about me, just me needing to work on these issues and things would be alright for us. but now i've realzied with an almost sad awakening that he too needs to work on things like this, or do you think it is okay for a grown man who is tired to take it out on me, verbally? maybe i am taking that too personally, and should not put that in here because he is not that/this bad when he is not real tired like he is now.
he does have days when he is like this and he is not tired but for the most part he is "okay". so i'm just confused now about how much he needs help along with me. i guess i needed to put this in words somewhere and this was a good a place as any.
any contributions to this topic would be appreciated. seems the board has slowed down quite a bit just like that! weird.
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