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help...i think i need advice on anger management...

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Old 9th June 2004, 4:50 AM   #1
organic chemistry
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Angry help...i think i need advice on anger management...

i dun really need to post in the breaking up,second chance forum anymore....as my relationship is finally over!!!

i'm usually not an angry person....like my friends know too....i'm easy going,very friendly and kind
but when it comes to love relationship...i really can't handle the stress and become a horrible person...

as just 2 hrs ago....me and my ex talked....but when he wanted his own free time...and asked me to leave him alone....i was so angry that i kicked his door really really hard....the door frame broke.......

i could get into legal trouble for that....

this guy,howard......we dated for almost a yr...and we fought a lot....

i used to be in a long term 3 yr relation with another guy,kevin....we never fight....we never had trouble....i never kick door....i never throw anything.....

but with howard....i become such a horrible person....

i wanna know y....is it simply becoz incompatibility?? or i'm really seriously in trouble for being an angry person

i went to see psychologist before...but she only recommended me to keep track of my anger and address it properly...i did gd during those sessions that's y i dun see her anymore....but recently thngs were getting rough between us and it happened again....

help....anyone has similar problem as me?? and deal with it properly??
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Old 9th June 2004, 5:24 AM   #2
pitprincess
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I am an angry person too LOL
I'm not really but to tell ya the truth you should really talk to your Dr about what took place tonight.

Sweets you should never let your anger get next to you where you have to do something to release anger like that.
Its always better to walk away and say tuff luck dude I'm out of here WITH OUT A BROKEN TOE from kicking the door frame
I believe that maybe your Dr would love to be able to talk with you about it if you would just make that call.
It wont hurt anything the hurt is already done. You sure your toe is OK?

Gosh that would hurt.. lol
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Old 9th June 2004, 6:30 AM   #3
siva_the_blumountain
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Red face

Hi OC,
I also have this same problem..but in my case it is my mom and younger sister on whom i throw things...shout..complain about everything..

The only similiarity is that we are like this only in a particular type of our relationships...i wondered why i am doing like this...

1) i think our expectations from these people are very very high

2) we dont want to listen to them (Selfish is such relationships)

The second usually happens if you are deprived of something during your child hood...

So just like in the "Movie back to the future" you go to your past and visit your childhood...and change those things...(use yr imaginntn)

Try..!!!
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Old 10th June 2004, 1:49 PM   #4
organic chemistry
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Red face

i'm more peaceful now...i mean i should really regret what i did....
breaking a door was not a right thing to do....

but at least i find peace becoz i know there is no hope in the relationship and i think i can move on

i sacrefice our friendship...but all i know is that if we keep our friendship...i'm still gonna think we will be together again someday...which is very unhealthy to think like that

i'm spoiled by my friends because they said he deserved a door kicked becoz of our messed up relationship...
i kinda not agree with them becoz then it would just cutivate my anger more....

thx pitprincess, my toe is alright.....i'm amazed that i didn't hurt my foot....only the door broke...

and to siva_the_blumountain....i dunno....i think so too....it just happens to me with certain ppl.....i'm normal most of the time until i'm with someone that got onto my nerve too much....

just bought a book called "make anger our ally" by neil clark warren....i'll spend my time reading it...and hopefully i can find more insight from this book
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Old 10th June 2004, 7:54 PM   #5
Miss lil Amie
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Wow! If you think you guys are an angry person you wouldn't know what to do if you knew me. lol. My family pisses me off like no other..I've punched wholes in the walls, I've kicked millions of wholes in the walls, I've kicked doors, I've thrown shoes at walls, I've shaken pop cans and opened them to make the carpet stained, and ofcourse I've used my mouth..every bad word in the book has come out of this chicks mouth!

Well actually, all that stuff was back a while ago..I haven't done any of that stuff in over a year..the worst thing I've done recently WHICH MAY I ADD I REGRET AND IS THE STUPIDES THING ON THE FACE OF THIS EART AND NOBODY SHOULD TRY IT BECAUSE IT'S A COWARDS WAY OUT OF PROBLEMS..lol-I slit my wrist a few times..but I haven't done that either in a while..it's dumb.

I guess when this happens so much anger is built up insdie of you that you just deal with it in bad ways..but now a days when I get angry I just remember that there is light at the end of every tunnel..sometimes you might not see it for a very long time..but when you do see it you will love it and what happened in the past won't even matter

Keep it real
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Old 11th June 2004, 1:50 AM   #6
siva_the_blumountain
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So OC..good to know that you are recovering...Thats life...good times, bad times nothin is permanent..

But about self help books..i used to buy a lot and usually read them also..but the last book i purchased "I moved your cheese"...was terriffic..after reading that book i have decided that i will buy no more of these stuff (that was the objective of the author)...if possibble try that book...it will lighten you up..

And Amie..to share with you...I have slit my wrist once...eleven slits in all..!! of that..3 are on the same place...means i located the vein..and tried to slit it repeatedly...and to make it less painfull i had consumed opium..(which started working after 4 hrs because i ate it and didnt smoke it..)..this happened when we broke up..

Its almost 3 years now but still its visible very very clear...I just look at them and laugh..now...

yeah it might be a dumb act..but that doesnt makes us to be a dumb person..we are still smarter...I have seen people who in thier entire life have not acted stupidly not even a single day and was always in full control of themselves..but suddenly one day they burst out..

So ..thats it..
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