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Hi,


My wife and I have hardly any sex - it was good back in the early days but not it is non existent (once or twice every other month). I have a strong sex drive - and for some strange reason have gone along the road of "It might get better tomorrow" She is always too tired or just wants a cuddle, does not initiate sex very well (a nudge or a kick is her idea) I personally have had too many knock backs from her, so do not know what the signs are for sex - if they exist.

She knows there is a problem but does nothing about it. Anything I suggest is simply ignored or I am told I have a one tracked mind. She wears more clothes at night than she does in the day sometimes - then parades around naked when she gets ready for work. This drives me crazy, I feel totally frustrated , she does have a lovely body - is this mind games? have I missed the cue to leave?

On top of this she has fallen pregnant - this is after 6 years of trying IVF, IUI etc. During the last IVF she would not express her feelings - I was reading them on a IVF/INFERTILITY forum I put her onto. Whilst I am pleased about the prospect of becoming a dad, the underlying problem is lack of sex still exists. I feel now she is pregnant, she has got what she wants and I am of no use other than the roof over head & food. Why she cannot see what this is doing is beyond me, she could not cope on her own. When the baby comes I will not be able to cope. I had hoped the pregnancy may hit on her intimate side .... not so far.

I try to suggest things showering together, go to bed early (she then says lets just have a cuddle) she is not interested. I have bought sexy underwear - she took it back. Foreplay is really hard work it just does not flow I get frustrated at her lack of knowledge on intimacy & trying to satisfy me. She does not like to touch me down below - oral is out of the question. If I try to kiss her she at times turns away says her asthma is bad - I view it all as rejection. I have had relationships in the past all of which were very satisfying. I want this relationship to work but I am accused of having a go if I say that things are still the same. I do leave it for a month or so between mentioning things, but never does she try to sort things out.

Am I being unreasonable or out of order? The longer it goes on the more I start to doubt myself. Should we both walk away and get on with our lives? We are in the middle of emmigrating to Canada but the way things are going I think I could be going alone?

I just cannot see what lies ahead she knows what the issues are but fails to act. She's even seen a clairvoyant who even mentioned that our sex life is not very good, & she needs to sort it out and cannot afford to lose me.... she's done nothing.

Any suggestions appreciated