I would really like to know if an emotional abusive relationship has these charactaristis, My husband that I married only 2 years ago and he has really changed. He tells me that I'm ugly that I deserved in my past to be beat on. When I'm ill he goes to work. We were in a car accident he pulled out in front of another car broke 7 ribs, never cried or even moaned. The only emotion I see him show is a very mean looking face. He gets mad if any one comes over to the house, if they do he treats them rude, then goes and stays in the bedroom for the duration of any company. He has no friends call the house to talk to him just his daughter and his mom. When he gets angry he drives two hours to his moms and he is a 54 year old man. He has not spoke much of his childhood. He never told me before I met him that he owed 26,000 on his sons student loan. He gets real mean looking when I don't go to work. His mother degrads me, she told me that I had to work 40 hours a week because her son can't support the whole family on his own (I have one kidney and I'm loosing that now) I feel like I am walking on glass when he is around. Last year he went to hit my son, I stepped in between them and I got hit by a lamp. It really was bad my eyes were black for a month and I used tape to more or less stitch my head. He would never go out of his way for me although I have for him. We are expecting a huge lawsuit settlement soon, I don't want to walk away before that is through, but yes I can't take him anymore. I don't even sleep in the same bed because that is where he goes when he gives his dirty looks. He also willnot do anything outside the house I want to do like socialize....he puts on a fake when he is at work and I know it. What do I do I'm confused!!!!
Emotional abuse? YES. It is also physical abuse. Get out of the house now. Call a shelter and ask for some legal help also. Whatever the lawsuit that you are waiting for, you most likely will still have the same rights to the settlement no matter if you are living with him or not.
Call a crisis hot line now (you can do a search for crisis centers in your area, or call the operator) and get yourself and your child out of that situation.
get out before something bad happens! I hope that you don't have a life insurance policy if so I say run as fast as you can and divorce just as quickly!
If it's making you upset and to the point where your aking us then I say yes!!! He sounds like a real jerk and you don't deserve this when there is so many other men that will treat you like you should be treated.
Pack when your husband is at work and get your son and yourself to a woman's shelter as soon as possible. This man is without a doubt an abuser, and you are having medical problems as is. Get away from this man--he is and will never be of comfort or support to you.
I'd also advise talking to a lawyer about obtaining a divorce, and also about the sharing of the future settlement.
After looking at every thing that was wrote. Yes I am getting out, but not me the police are making him leave and I get an order of protection. Also I found out that he will have to give me spousal support to help with the house. I know that I still need to seek professional help, counseling, and support. This isn't the first time that I have been abused, but it was just different. I feel that I should have known better. But the honeymoon phase only lasted six months, I should have known then. Now maybe my other two older kids will come to see me and I will get on with my life. You were all right in what you said, thank you again for your honesty and support. I'll keep you posted
I am so glad to hear you are actually doing something about it. Most people sit around and never get out. It minght be painfull at first but in the long run things will be much better. Don't forget we are always here for you when you need help or just want to talk.
Wonderful news, Hippiechic! I hope you find lots of happiness down the road. You deserve it. Make sure you let us know how things are going. Stop by the shack anytime you need to get something off your chest, or realize that someone out there cares. Good luck.
I was very happy to read that you are getting out of that relationship. I was in an abusive relationship the past 4 yrs. and left ( finally!) one year ago as of this March 26th. (Kudos to me,but it was HARD!!!!!) I'm sure you've heard it all before (especially because this is not the first bad relationship you've been in) but for your sake and your child(ren) you have to get out. Go. Leave. Harden your heart to the sympathy-grabbing techniques you KNOW he'll employ and focus on yourself. I know sometimes you probably feel just as guilty because violence begets violence. Acting out to defend yourself or child is a necessary form of survival. Don't let him try the it's -your-fault-to Strategy. He's a grown man (I use the term "man" liberally) and will be fine. The hardest part about leaving an abusive relationship is to look back and see that the abuser is fine. He WON'T be racked with guilt at what he did, he WONT be crying in his pillow for you every night (Regardless of what he may claim) and he WONT EVER realize what he lost. The best way I heard getting out of an abusive relationship was this: "Leaving a bad relationship is like being in a play. You have rehearsal after rehearsal after rehearsal until... BAM! Once and for all Opening Night has come." So, I hope this is the case! If so, then break a leg! (Ha! Just not his.) Good Luck.
Please note: The suggestions and advice offered on this web site are opinions only and are not to be used in the place of professional psychological counseling or medical advice. If you or someone close to you is currently in crisis or in an emergency situation, contact your local law enforcement agency or emergency number.
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