[zephyr]

Dear forum-mates,

I've posted a thread before but now seem to be in dire need of some sound advice. A few days ago, I initiated "no contact" with my LD boyfriend of 7 months after he repeadly blew me off on the phone and ignored my emails. Yesterday, I wrote him a short but succinct break-up letter and mailed it right away. As we live far apart, he should get it in a few days and so in the meantime there is no way I could call him or email him- it would be far too weird. Funny thing is, despite being exceedingly rude and impolite, he never apologized or took a minute to write an email. My biggest dilemma is that he is so bloody mercurial. One week he will be hopelessly romantic and gentle while the next he suddenly makes an about-face and treats me with cold indifference. While I am certain that this will be the last time I have spoken to him or contacted him (my resolve to keep up "no contact" grows stronger as time passes), I am afraid that I will crumble should he contact me once he receives my letter (I know he isn't expecting it). Do you guys think I should keep ignoring him or should I take the time to explain my position? I am very afraid that if I talked to him again, all my hard work in learning to resist him will be undone and I will be back to square one-feeling worthless and humiliated every time he chooses to blow me off. Please advise me on this. I'm at my wit's end....

[bluechocolate]

Do you guys think I should keep ignoring him or should I take the time to explain my position?

Didn't you do this in the letter? Did you specify in the letter that you did not wish him to contact to you again? If so then you are under no obligation to speak to him or to explain yourself. If talking to him makes you feel worthless & humiliated, then don't talk to him. Are you absolutely sure that you finished with this relationship?

[zephyr]

Um, I guess I was fairly clear but not entirely.... I've broken up with him before and said it was over but everytime I did, he thought I was kidding. This time I am dead serious and won't let him sway me. Because of past attempts at a breakup, I expect him to email me in bewilderment- How could I possibly break up with him! (deep sarcasm here )
It is a bit of a convoluted situation (He has already emailed me telling me he misses me a lot-he apparently hasn't yet received the letter and is acting as if everything is just peachy) If anybody can enlighten me or tell me how to act on this, I'd be forever grateful...

Bluechocolate-thank you for taking the time to respond Very much appreciated

[Just Visiting]

Stand firm with your position in "No Contact". If he contacts you after receiving the letter then don't reply. If you do reply, then it will just go back and forth...why waste that time? There is no need to explain yourself...the letter should be enough.