[babyblue894]

after being happily married for 14 and a half years, 3 children aged 14, 11, and 10. Our relationship was always good we werent only a close couple but was also bestfreinds we had been through so much together. He is nearly 33 and iam 32. when ever we was apart ( example if i was at work or if he was out fishing with his dad even if he was only gone for a few hours he would always phone me a few times just to say hello and check if i was ok. we moved into a perfect house and area for us and our children in august 2002. I had a daytime job from june 2003 and he started working nights from march 2003. We had to do it this way to fit in with the kids as there was no one to help out. We put into buy our house and got a morgage which we started paying end of december 2003. We booked a big holiday which was my husbands idea for august this year. We also had a big loan for a car and a bit left to do our house which was a joint decision, which we propley talked out between ourselfs.( we did not have any money problems at all and could afford everything we took on)
I noticed about 3 months before this he was becoming distance not very talkative i kept asking him if he was alright and if he fell out of love with me but he said he had nt and not to be silly. I asked him this on several occasions
and he said the same thing and said he was only tired. ( i put this dont to his job) The begining of january this year, i came home after work my husband was lying on the settee pretened to be asleep my sister came he got of the settee so they could sit down. They left after a short time and i told him when he got home after hes night shift i wanted to know the real reason he was being like this. (by this time he was lying back down on the settee) he then told me he didnt love me anymore he didnt know why. He said he tryed to get his love back but couldnt. He said he had been looking in the paper for a flat that day and was gonna confess all to me the next day but beings i bought it up he told me then. He said there was nobody else and i thought this was true
as he was always in weekends with me and left for work and always came back the proper time which he also pointed out. I asked why go through with the morgage, holiday and big loan and he said cos he thought it would bring us closer together.
He left the next day. Two weeks later he got my oldest son to ring me at work to see if i would talk to him which i did. He told me he was moving to coventry ( i live in the westmidlands) i asked him why he said a woman was putting him up,he said he was fond of her i asked him if he had slept with her and he said yes. He told me nothing had gone on while we was together. He told the kids before he told me the kids was already confused as he had left me and because we was so close and they didnt notice anything was wrong.
a week after that he took this woman to his moms house who lives down the road from me, then he played up to take the kids to her house which i did let him because he kept going on.
It has now been 3 and a half months since he left we havnt seen each other i dont think my heart could take it as im going through a hard time. The woman he is with now has got 3 kids off 3 diffrent men aged 12, 5, and 10 months old. I know the baby isnt his because the baby is quarter cast. The woman he is with is aged 37 and a woman like that he would call names, apparently she is not the kind of woman he would go for in personalty and everything. the kids say he looks unhappy and they dont think the relationship will last. He told the kids he is not getting much sleep the kids said he dresses diffrent and hes very quiet. He is always asking about me like whot am i doing and if im ok. I have started divorce proceedings and the first petition papers he recived he rang up the house on the way to work my freind answered he sounded uncomfortable and asked to speak to one of our kids. My daughter spoke to him he asked her to give me a letter which she did and it was the completed divorce papers he wrote a note asking me to check if he had filled them in correct and to post them on. He has the kids one day a week on a saturday takes them out with him and hes new girlfreind. He told our daughter six weeks ago that he was pissed off with his new woman and with her 5 year old son he said hes really naughty and he wasnt going to be with her for much longer but he still is. hes mom rang me last saturday and after a brief conversation she asked if i was going through with the divorce and that she didnt think this woman was hes type. At the end of this conversation she asked if i would ever have him back i told her i was still going through with the divorce and i didnt know if i would have him back as alot has gone on. i couldnt answer that question untill i was in that situation i wouldnt know. but i said i would be there for him if ever he was in trouble. the next day i spoke to her again and again in conversation she told me she was worried about him. i was furious and said why incase she dumped him and he has no where to go she said something about people make mistakes but i was too angry to take it in i dont remeber how the conversation ended. i know my husband wouldnt confide in hes mom the only person he used to convide in was me. I just think hes mom would like us to get back together as we was good together. Nobody knows where this woman has come from the whole thing is a mistery all our freinds and familey said we was good together and could not belive it. He doesnt ring the kids they just go down his moms and he picks them up from there every saturday. Every thing he has done is totally out of character im not ready for answers at the moment from him, as far as him and hes mom knows im doing ok but im not really.
Its saturday again today hes got the kids at the momment i fell very anxious i dont feel good and very nervous. I would like to hear from people who are going through or have gone through similar situations. thanxs