Cheating, Flirting, and JealousyBeing unfaithful to your significant other or suspect them of the same? Can't stand the way they flirt? Jealous? Discuss your experiences here.
CAN ANYONE GIVE ME THEIR OPINION ON THIS MATTER. I HAVE JUST STARTED DATING SOMEONE I HAVE PLATONICALLY KNOWN FOR SEVERAL YEARS. HE WAS MARRIED FOR A FEW YEARS THEN FOUND OUT SHE WAS CHEATING ON HIM AT WORK ( THEY WORK TOGETHER AT A LARGE MANUFACTURER). IT WAS AN UGLY NASTY DIVORCE AND NOW AFTER ABOUT A YEAR HE IS HAPPY AGAIN. HE IS CLOSE FRIENDS WITH A FAMILY MEMBER OF MINE WHO KNOWS HIM WELL AND SAID THAT HE IS NOW ADJUSTED AND HAPPY (AS HE HAS DATED A FEW OTHERS BEFORE ME). THE PROBLEM? (OR IS IT?) HE WEARS A PINKY RING THAT WAS HIS WEDDING RING (CUT DOWN TO SIZE OF COURSE). IT IS A LOVELY RING. HE WEARS IT ON HIS LEFT HAND. I DON'T KNOW HOW I FEEL ABOUT THIS AND NOT ABOUT TO SAY ANYTHING TO HIM. IS IT JUST A PIECE OF JEWELRY OR A SOMETHING MORE?
PLEASE HELP WITH SOME SAGE ADVICE. THANK YOU
You'll have to wait until you've dated him a while to say anything. Meanwhile, take a course on how to type using caps and lower case so your posts will be easier to read...thanks. He'll love you more and so will I.
Or, you could have some gawdamn trust in a man to sort out his feelings. If you think, that after a 'NASTY DIVORCE' and infidelity, that he's still attached to his ex-wife, you don't belong in a relationship with him. Leave his ring alone. People have 100% volition over their own feelings. Don't be the arbiter of someone elses.
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I have a friend who was once engaged - he bought a ring (to the tune of 1100 bucks!) for himself to wear during that time. They have since broken up entirely, but he liked the ring so much he simply wears it now on his other hand.
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Originally posted by Dave1234, joy of joys and greatest LoveShack love toy.
I, Dave, hath chosen to also photo with long lense which protrudes from my camera of life force and shows falic symbol erected in direction of assembled love mass. .... but telephoto lense being hard and erect will attract many horny love-sturved babes to my shift before deadline and I will go into press room behind ink barrel to press lense into soft, velvet case and make love froever more. .....
I still wear my old engagement ring. It's a beautiful ring, doesn't look like an engagement ring, and has zero sentimental value. I just really like it.
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I expect to pass through this world but once. Any good, therefore, that I can do or any kindness that I can show to my fellow creatures, let me not defer nor neglect it, for I shall not pass this way again.
I think he wears it to remind him of previous experiences. I don't think there is a problem with remembering life, but at the same thing, there is a problem with dwelling on certain sectors. It sounds to me like he wishes to move on from his ex, but not forget entirely about the whole thing, so he wears it as a reminder of what they had (they were obviously in love at one point)
I wouldn't have a problem with it unless you were a serious couple... when you first start dating, it would be a grievance, but I wouldn't see a need for him to change what he did until it was more of a serious point.
Maybe he just likes the ring. He picked it out, probably paid alot of money for it, I think that's pretty resourceful to cut it down to size and still wear it. The fact that he cut it down and is not wearing it on the ring finger should let you know it ain't no thang.
There could be all sorts of reasons why he's continuing to wear his wedding ring. Maybe it's there to remind him how NOT to go wrong with his next relationship. In which case you could be pleased that he's wearing it. If it indeed was a NASTY divorce I doubt he's wearing it to remind him of his ex-wife - or perhaps it's there to remind of how she was before the divorce so he doesn't get mired down in feelings of hatred and bitterness. Or perhaps, as some have already pointed out, he simply wears it because it is a nice ring (you've said so yourself).
Regardless - it's just a ring - a thing - a lump of gold. Of itself it has no emotional value whatsoever - only what he, and more importantly in this case you, attach to it.
Anyway, you state that you've just STARTED dating - so who knows? You may discover that you're not right for each other. In which case the entire issue becomes irrelevant. Wait and see how things are going and then one day, if it still conerns you, gently ask him about the ring. You may be surprised by his answers and you may be even more surprised when he offers to take it off if it bothers you!
Originally posted by Tony
Meanwhile, take a course on how to type using caps and lower case so your posts will be easier to read...thanks. He'll love you more and so will I.
ROTFL - Tony, you slay me!!
amandan940 -- I think he probably just felt it was the practical thing to do with the ring. Why let it sit in a drawer somewhere going to waste? I would have done the same thing.
To those who said guys shouldn't wear pinky rings, that's just ridiculous!
The only person who knows why he wears it is him. Ask him.
When I had my wedding ring reset a few years ago I took the side diamonds out of the engagement ring I had from my first fiancee to use in the setting, then I had the old ring made into a brooch with the center diamond. I'm not going to waste good diamonds and platinum!
Please note: The suggestions and advice offered on this web site are opinions only and are not to be used in the place of professional psychological counseling or medical advice. If you or someone close to you is currently in crisis or in an emergency situation, contact your local law enforcement agency or emergency number.
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