[Onyx]

My husband and I are expecting our first child, a daughter to be born any day now, but I personal have come to a spiritual speed bump.

My religion, Paganism, is highly misunderstood in the community I and I fear for the safety of my child as the years come and she gains her own independance. My faith is strong, and despite the wrongs that have been done to me for my choice of practice, I hold no grudges. But what about my baby?

You see I was forced by my father to grow up the Catholic way and did not gain my own independance until I lived with my mum. His side of the family never understood why I "abondoned" them for the devil ( how paganism becomes satanism, I do not see..) and disowned me.

How should I deal with Hannah. I don't want to rob her of her ability to find the faith that calls to her, but I dont want her to feel abandoned in the world that we live in. She's going to ask questions, which would requires answers from a specific point of view. I'm afraid to raise her with my gentle values, for the chance that she would be ostracized by others, or even physically hurt.

I'm so confused. I want to share , what I feel is a beautiful religion with my daughter, but I'm terrified to have her hurt, or even take away the chance for her to make her own decisions.

I'd like to hear your opinions...
Onyx

[tattoomytoe]

well what is your husbands view? i say it doesn't really matter until she is older to know whats going on... then you can do your thing invite her let her learn about your faith, and let her do the same with her fathers faith, and encourage her to find something that suits her.

[Leikela]

What part of the world are you from? If you're in the US, then what part? I live in the North East and people are more tolerable here when it comes to people's differences. I think a lot of Pagans live happily with their religion without any abuse from others. I think vicinity has a lot to do with it.

Introduce your daughter to your religion and give her the option of wanting to become a part of it. I wouldn't worry about the abuse part right now though and I wouldn't let that stand in your way of introducing your daughter to Paganism.

[sonofhud]

You see I was forced by my father to grow up the Catholic way

How did he force you?

[gaia]

Are you concerned because you experience prejudice yourself? It would be useful to know where you live - country at least. I think you're right about letting Hannah choose for herself when she's old enough - spiritual beliefs are so personal.

I don't know much about your situation, but I do know that late pregnancy induced all kinds of weird fears in me that I hadn't had before. Hormones can make you feel very vulnerable and fears for your child are not that uncommon.

I guess what I'm saying is - I don't know whether you have genuine reason to fear for Hannah, in which case please say and we can try to advise you or whether you're particularly emotional at this time.

Whatever, I wish you all the best and I hope the birth is a wonderful experience for you

[Arabess]

I was lucky. My Mom was Jewish and my Dad was Baptist and they became Charismatics together. Based on this, my brother and I were taken for a period of time to many different churches. My Mom felt this was the only way we would be able to chose our own path as adults. It never seemed confusing, I always thought it was very interesting.

So, maybe as your child matures, you would want to open he/she up to a variety of beliefs. No one can ridicule or judge that.

[quankanne]

Onyx -- just raise her to be a loving child, seeking the good in others and caring for others in all senses. I think that's the foundation of a lot of spiritual beliefs ("love one another as I have loved you") and can be applied whatever you claim -- Judaismn, paganism, Christianity, etc. Regardless of belief, people respond to others who are good and kind, and are less likely to feel threatened by their differences unless they've got a streak of "anti-good" that causes them to react otherwise.

as she grows, show Hannah (lovely, lovely name) the wonder and beauty of your adopted faith -- and let her know that not everyone feels the same way you do about it. Again, I think as they get to know her better, they're going to view her beliefs based on what they know of her.

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why do people connect paganism to satanism? good question. might be the word "pagan," which has more of a negative connotation. "Wicca" (to me) is a little more of a comfortable term that tells me someone is connected pretty strongly to mother earth, and isn't necessarily satanic or anti-Christian. Just a whole other way of seeing things.

sonofhud? her dad may have "forced" her to practice a faith she didn't innately feel comfortable with -- how many of us who grew up in religious households remember being told "you live under my roof, you abide by my rules, and that includes going to church every Sunday." Also, one of the "rules" we Catholics abide by is attending Mass every Sunday. It's a mortal sin, one of the biggies, and I'm sure that's what Onyx's dad was trying to do -- make her meet her daily obligation without necessarily explaining the "why" of it.