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What is the best way to deal with getting over a crush on a friend?

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Old 25th March 2004, 3:52 PM   #1
dotuser
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What is the best way to deal with getting over a crush on a friend?

What is the best way to deal with getting over a crush on a friend?
--Yes I know, if she was really my friend I wouldn't have a crush on her.

I have known this girl for a while now, vice versa., and recently I have... struck an interest in her, even though we have been... and still are 'friends.'
Exhibit A
A week ago, we went to the movies (Dawn of the Dead, real-romantic ) together at her request (1:1), and not to forget to mention her attire was not what it usually was at the movies. Please note, we have in the past been to the movies with a group of friends.

Exhibit B
Touching. Touches my hair. Touches my stomach (Yes, my stomach...). I've read some pages that say touching is a way to show your interested in someone, but that's just another persons opinion.

---------
Two Exhibits
---------

Fact
1. She has liked me before.
2. We will not see each other in a few months
2::a. Graduation from HS
3. We see each other everyday.


So, I conclude;
How should I get over this crush on a 'friend' that is either the result of her just being more friendly/comfortable around me, or 'yanking my chain.' This weekend I was invited to the movies (The Prince and Me, even though I don't think it comes out then. They must be confused.) with her, and our friends.
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Old 25th March 2004, 3:56 PM   #2
sinkerswim
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Just go for it, and tell her how you feel.
Say..I dont want it to ruin our friendship, but I want to know if you want to start going out out, with me.
Cant hurt.
Or could it?
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Old 25th March 2004, 4:25 PM   #3
sportsloving
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The great thing about Crushes? They are usually pretty short lived.

If you are interested and would like to see what kind of relationship you could have together, ask her out on a "real date". If she liked you before, chances are she likes you now~

Best of luck!
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Old 25th March 2004, 11:55 PM   #4
dotuser
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Interesting,
First off, Thanks for replying.
Lets see if I understand this correctly.

A crush is only temporary (short-lived). Duh
Best resolution would be to go for it as this will provide an answer to whether or not a relationship was ever possible, and not going for it would put myself into self-denial (if insecurity was a problem).

What will I do?... How does this sound for a game plan?
I will first meet up with her at school, not work as I considered that a 'no no' for obvious reasons, and ask her if she wants to go on a date.

If Yes, I tell her I will call her sometime and set it up.

Should that be a day or two be good enough to setup a date?

If No, I tell her that I still would like to be friends and say I hope I didn't ruin the friendship.

Praying that my actions will not make things uncomfortable between us.

-------------
Alright, how does that sound?
Sorry that my post is unorganised. Thinking out loud, just need some insight from others.
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Old 26th March 2004, 12:10 AM   #5
sportsloving
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If you ask her out you will accomplish two things: she may just have a "crush" back on you, you two go out, have a great time, and hey what is better than dating someone you know as a friend and actually know you like? Or she says no, and if you play your cards right, you keep your friend. (Never have dumped a friend as a friend just cause they asked me out.)

You can do it jokingly, of course, to see her initial reaction .... "you are such a great friend, think it could go farther?" or you could just ask straight out. Either way, whatever you do, I wish you great luck and hope it works out for you!
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Old 26th March 2004, 12:39 AM   #6
Dixiecron
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Dotuser,

Don't go for the joking bit, just go for it. Otherwise you're just playing games and being a wuss. Just be cool and casual. Say: "I'd like to take you out to dinner on ----day. I thought we could go to ------- restaurant".

She might say "you mean like a date?"

You say "Yes, like a date". Then you don't say anything until she answers. Then you wil have the answer to your riddle...

If she says yes, then you say "cool, I'll pick you up at 8 on ---day" (you have actually planned out the date, right?). Strike while the iron is hot, do not give yourself the chance to chicken out. Make the date when she says yes, don't call later.

If she says "----day is not good, how about ----otherday?" then your are good to go, since she made a counteroffer. Go out on the other day.

If she says "-----day is not good, maybe another time" then you are screwed, she's saying "no" in a nice way.

If she flat out says no, well at least you tried. Better than most guys, and now that you have been rejected by someone you like, its no big deal to go looking for someone else who you don't even know.

That being said, what you mentioned in your previous posts sounds like she wants you. Now quit posting here and go get her!
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