Stay married to keep him happy, or leave to be happy

Summerlove

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I'm 25 years old, and have been with my husband since I was 18. I have been married 4 1/2 years, and with him for a total of 7.

Last year, I had a short affair. I admitted to it, mainly due to guilt, and promised that it wouldn't happen again. The problem is that it has. I really do love my husband, but I don't think that I am in love with him. And the truth is, I'm falling for the man I'm having an affair with. Don't get me wrong, my husband is a wonderful man. He is kind, generous, loving, and supportive. He tells me that I am his Angel and the love of his life. I do believe him, but I am beginning to drift farther and farther away. At some point, I think I just changed and we grew apart. I'm afraid of losing him, but am also afraid of losing out if I give up my affair.

I have told my husband that I want to work on things, and he is trying, but deep down I don't think I want to work things out. I got married young and am grateful for the time we've had together, but I am mostly afraid to hurt him. I want to explore what else is out there because I know I have missed out on a lot. I don't think it's fair to him, or to me.

Am I wrong for feeling this way? I am hurting him by not being faithful, and hurting myself for not sharing my true feelings and allowing myself to be happy again. I'm falling for this new man and have no idea what to do. I'm considering separation, but I think divorce is inevitable. Any suggestions?