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Should I Stay Or Should I Go Now?

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In Search Of... Having a hard time forming friendships or finding companions, lovers, or associates? Is someone pursuing an unwelcome relationship with you? Talk about your experiences here.

Old 19th March 2004, 12:49 AM   #1
FeeFee
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Unhappy Should I Stay Or Should I Go Now?

I have known this guy for about a year. We work for the same company but in different departments. There was always flirtation between us, then he broke up with gf six months ago and things got a little more heated. I am attracted to him on a physical, mental and emotional level but I just don't know if he feels the same way. We have fun at work together and have great conversations outside of work too. We havent' slept together yet but it's only a matter of time, we have amazing chemistry.

Although I know that I'm the only woman in his life and that he enjoys my company and is attracted to me, he has never made an effort to push things beyond the casual relationship. For example, we've gone out drinking together but he's never invited me to dinner. I have been playing it very cool up to this point because I know there is nothing that will make a man run away faster than if he senses a "commitment talk" coming. However, I am getting frustrated with how things have not developed, and need to know whether I am wasting my time. The last time I briefly brough the subject up he said something along the lines of, 'You can't rush me.' My question is - how long to wait?? Or do you think he has already made his decision??
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Old 19th March 2004, 5:42 AM   #2
opentonewadvice
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Join Date: Feb 2004
Location: Southern California
Posts: 30
" Try a new approach to things"

seems like he is the type of guy that believe's in the concept of "If it ain't broke why try to fix it" I think you can kind of get the picture. He basically enjoys having a comfort zone. He is content with having a casual dating relationship without the worries of committing. And you have to either learn to deal with that situation or have the power to change it. It is very simple, Just cut back alot of the time you spend around him personally. What that does is let him know that you are independent and have no time to waste , you take things serious and he will begin to miss seeing you and the attention he gets from you. Once he feels like you are pulling back some he will begin to pull in closer trying to feel you out more like a new found interest. But if you continue your same old rountine he will never really change because he knows you will be there no matter what so why change , and why commit. He might even think that you are content with the present situation, because you have never shown any different yourself. So try a new approach. a change is good sometimes.
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