[Mike_H]

Well It's 5:01am in the morning in Calgary me and jen have finalised our decision to break up forever. After 2 months after i gave her the ring she realised finally that it wasn't ment to be ill admit i cried allot and felt my life could not go on I think the hardest time was between the Saturday and the Friday we finished was the hardest longest week in my life . I have come to terms with the break up and because i love her so much i have to let her go. I think this will be better for both of us i will be moving back to nova Scotia in about a month after we finalise all of our debts and I get some money together for a plane ticket and stuff. Ill admit im very sad but at the same time I'm excited for what feats await me I wonder if all this time I too have just felt the security blanket as well and have never truly been in love I am sitting here writing down my thoughts as i pack up everything to move into my sisters place some people may say ive given up to easy but when you poor your heart out and get no response back its a done deal no dice as i would commonly say. The one thing i am taking out of this is 8 wonderful years of happy times all I can say is you never actually truly know what another person is thinking Im actually happy that we have ended on good terms but our relationship ends her I can no longer be her best friend or pals for that matter I simply choose not to because I need me time now and I think it will be good for both of us you know the saying "Change is good" well i plan to put that to the test now and see what life can throw at me I know I maybe rambling on but if this helps one person through a tough break up I know that this relationship although came to a sudden stop it was all worth it and I wouldn't trade it for the world. Thank you

[spencer]

sorry mike I do feel for you.
The feelings of grief and devastation will get better, you need to hang on.
Ramble all you want it helps to release all the emotions stuck inside.
I know from experience.
I felt weird and disassociated from the world for awhile. I went to a kickass therapist for a couple of sessions and felt better, i was having panic attacks.
time took care of the rest. My family was so helpful and supportive. I would call my dad and he would help me through the anxiety. I called my brother to come over and help me pack my ex's stuff, (the ex would come over everyday to get 4 things, exasperating my panic attacks).
My mom and her/our girlfriends would take me out to the bar and keep me occupied.
I doubled up my yoga classes.
the next month a really cute, great guy asked me out. I didn't feel up to it but agreed anyway.
I felt like i was 16 again. the excitement of doing new stuff, kept me going.
Its been exactly 1 year & 2weeks I now am happy with my life and do not regret my decision.

my advice to you is to reach out and ask for help when you need it. people will be there for you. Take extra care of yourself.