[lostgirl]

hi, how do you know if a guy is playing games or is just getting to know you?

i am really confused and this post might not make sense, pardon me.
i have been seeing a guy for 2 weeks and we have seen each other a few times and texted and phoned each other. we get on really well. i have not slept with him yet, but he hints at it. i don't know why i won't put out yet. we don't plan in advance when we are going to see eachother next, it is like, if i see you, i see you sort of thing. i have a little daughter, and he has met her once. i am really independent and i don't want him to think that i am looking for someone to look after us. the problem is i don't know where i stand with him yet. it is too early, i know. should i just relax and see what happens. maybe he is scared to take on 2 of us. am i just speaking sh@t?

Ask yourself what it is you're looking for.

Are you okay with just having a casual aquaintance to hang out with from time to time?

Or would you prefer to develop a committed relationship with someone?

Believe it or not, YOU call the shots on what it is you are wanting....maybe not with this guy, but in general. If you're looking for a relationship, then don't settle for less. Don't settle for being someone's chick to hang out with from time to time with.

It's good you haven't yet slept with him, what would be the rush anyway?

Sure, it could be possible that he's just taking things slow because he's a little overwhelmed by the fact that you have a daughter......and he doesn't want to jump in too quickly, in case he realizes it's more than he can handle.......but hey, good for you that you're independent and taking good care of your little girl........you DESERVE a man who will admire and respect you for that....so if this guy can't, never fear, there will be someone out there who will, for sure.

[lostgirl]

Thank you befuddled

you helped me realise that i don't need to sit around and wonder and analyse everything he says and does from every angle and wonder what it all means. i am not comfortable being someone's chick to hang round with from time to time. i realise now i want someone to have the homefires burning when i get home from work..haha.

[clia]

I know I wouldn't be rushing to sleep with a guy who couldn't even ask me out on a proper date. The "if I see you, then I see you" thing sounds weird to me.

[lostgirl]

hi clia

yeah, it is weird. the more i think of it, the more i realise he probably wants a f*ck buddy. i haven't had a 'proper' relationship in 2 years - just casual dating - and then i met him and started having 2nd thoughts bout him. he definitely stirred somehting in me, but not enuff to hit him ova the head and drag him back to my cave. maybe he the next rung up in my ladder to meeting 'the one'. oh well..back to the drawing board