[calithin83]

For some reason i feel uncomftorable being home, it sux! shouldnt i be happy when im home, its just every one seems so tense-my mom and my dad...it sux, i barely talk to them, so i just stay in my room most of the time because sometimes when i talk to them or when they talk to me-especially my dad its just to say soemthing bad..it just pushes me away and to stay in my room....i dunno sometimes i feel its just me..maybe im the one with the problems....but then sometimes i think its them...theyre strict...i cant explain to them how i feel or anything cos they take it persoanlly..so basically i rather stay quiet...i just hate being home.....yet i dont have money to be on my own.....how can i get along with my parents better?? im 20.
and also i feel like they think im stupid or something...its rare when i hear them say something nice about me, but maybe once again its cos i dont do anything nice fr them to say somethin nice.....but the reason i dont do it is because when i do somethin nice it doesnt seem like they aknowledge it so im just whatever...yet i hate this...i just feel so off...

[Darkangelism]

Your mind is asserting its independence, i am also 20, and i too hate being home, i am away at school most of the time, but when i am home i feel like i am being tortured, hell just tonight my parents were annoyed at something that i did that they didnt agree with and we arguing with me on it, so i understand what it is like for parents to seemingly choke you, you should try getting a job and leaving it will make life a lot easier. Then you can do stuff and not tell them, cause for me, i dont even tell them that i am dating somebody cause they will bother me about it.

[TheFaithfulWife]

When I was your age (19)I had the same problem. I was confused about why they seemed to dig at me when ever I was in the room until I overheard them talking one night when they thought I was out with friends.

MOM: I wish she would come out of her room and talk to us, other then to have dinner she hardly leaves her room.

Dad: I asked her to run to the store for me yesterday and she said she would, but when she didn't leave after an hour and I asked her again she yelled "Okay, you don't have to harass me about it" I was changing the oil on my car or I would have gone myself.

Mom: well you know how bent out of shape she gets when you ask her to do something.
DAD: well I have to ask her more then once, and that makes me lose my temper!

MOM: I just want her to come out and be with the family without being so defensive, I know she is growing up and will leave us soon and I am going to miss her. I wish she knew how much.

DAd: yeah, I was just thinking how much I miss her and I bowling, she never wants to go anymore, alway seems to want to be with her friends instead.

I then slammed the door and let them know I was there.
I asked my dad to go bowling the following weekend, and I helped my mom cook dinner the next night.
I stayed with my parents until I was 23, and my mom said that the change in me made them change the way they treated me.

All they wanted was that connection that they missed. You can be an adult and still be their baby.
With my oldest son I have made the effort to give him his privacy but also let him know that I expect him to participate in the family also.
Its a matter of balance.

Talk to your parents, help them do things without being asked, and see if there is a change in the way you are treated. If after a couple of months you see no change then it is probably the time to move on.

Good luck
The Faithful Wife

[corythosaurus]

Parents get very nervous when their children get old enough to fly the coop.

I think Faithful explained a possible senario very well. You are an adult now. Step up to your parents and have a mature conversation with them. In each stage of a childs developement, new parameters have to be established. This sounds like it's another one of those times.

Just remember, you'll always be their little girl.