backwards steps....how do you do it?

etta · 4th February 2004, 8:34 PM

So there is a guy that i have been very casually involved with for the past couple of years (think friends with benefits).

to my liking, he decides that we should try to step up the relationship and start "dating". Of course, i am a little apprehensive about this sudden interest of his to become more than just friends with benefits, but i give it a try anyway because he is everything i have been looking for in a man.

he is fairly shy when it comes to women, and i'm not sure how aggresive i'm supposed to be. i.e. we've been on a "date", it was wonderful, he calls/writes, but i am unsure if i am the one who is supposed to initiate a second "date".

also, how many of you have been in a situation where you have had to go from being nothing more than sexually involved with someone to slowing it down and trying to start a relationship with them?

Darkangelism · 5th February 2004, 12:37 AM

You can initiate for the 2nd date, if you want, the best way would be to say, i really enjoyed the first date, why don we go out again.

6th February 2004, 12:55 AM

Quote:

had to go from being nothing more than sexually involved with someone to slowing it down and trying to start a relationship with them?

Nothing more then sexually involved, what has the world come to when being sexually involved means nothing, and its less casual then seeing someone. Like really.

Sex is like the most emotional thing i have ever gone though, i dont know how i could have ever have done it casually with someone who i was not in love with, like it messed me up big time, and if i didnt have a girlfriend who was by myside after it happened, i would have gone crazy, i could hardly handle it.

BUt really, i dont get how sex can be so 'casual' and basically unmeaning full. Now i dont think its the pure and only sign of true love but i dont think its something that should be 'casual'.

But to the actual question, of course you can initiat the second date. I would like a girl saying she was interested in another date, that takes alot of stress off of him. And if you both had a good time you have nothing to worry about.