i in need of some advice. my best friend has been dating this guy for about 3 months now. she seems to really like him, at least i think so. Anyways, he can be a real jerk. If she wants to do something she has to ask him or he gets all pissed off. What makes him even more pissed pff is when i'm with her. For example: the other day myself, her and one of our friends, another girl, all went to the mall and just hung out for a while and when she got to her house (which is her boyfriends house, there living toghter) he came out cussed me and her out. luckley he does not beat her or I would have to beat the hell out of him. The thing is I don't see alot anymore. What should I do? Should I tell her that I think that she should leave him? All of her friends dont like him at all.
p.s. if you read my other post; this is a different girl.
I can totally relate to this.....MY best friends boyfriend absolutely loathes me...for no reason other than that he thinks that her and I cause too much attention when we are together. He thinks that all we do is talk to guys, look for guys....and so on....It's unbelievable, when he is not thinking that I'm off peer pressuring her to be w/ other guys he's too busy thinking that we are lesbians...LOL I know....it's crazy but I think he really is crazy.
Luckily she is strong enough to tell him that "I was there before him and I'll be there after him"....I've known this girl for about 13yrs I'm sure w/ time she'll realize he's not her ideal mate.
I definitely suggest that you let her know of your concerns and no so much tell her to leave him but tell her to stick up for her self and realize that what he is doing is wrong. I say don't tell her to leave him b/c that can only come from her, she'll only leave when she's ready. Don't abandon or stop trying to reach her, hopefully she'll soon realize what's going on.
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"La cura es mas cara que la enfermedad" Frankie Ruiz
Skids is a guy. That might change the equation a fair bit...
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I expect to pass through this world but once. Any good, therefore, that I can do or any kindness that I can show to my fellow creatures, let me not defer nor neglect it, for I shall not pass this way again.
But the same should still aply, except for I don't think he thinks your out getting guys together but more maybe getting it on together. Still I say talk to her and don't let go of your freindship.
It sounds like your friend's boyfriend has some major trust/self esteem problems, Costume. What does your friend think about that?
Skids...that's a pretty rotten situation. Does your friend even realize how horrible he is or is she just like blindly in love with him and blind to all his faults? I dunno about telling her to leave him, that'll just piss her off and push her towards him. It's weird how that works, but that's how it works.
I think it's your friend's responsibility to make the choice, if needed, between her boyfriend and her other friends, inlcuding you.
Just as Costume's friend made some guidelines to her boyfriend, the same will have to be done in your case IF she wants to continue being friends with you.
I would send her a note saying for her to let you know when you can visit her without him being rude to you and if she couldn't work that out....then you would step back for the sake of her possible relationship...and wait to see what happens.
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