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boyfriend doesnt ask enough questions...talks about himself mostly

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Old 9th December 2003, 7:07 PM   #1
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boyfriend doesnt ask enough questions...talks about himself mostly

hey all,
my bf seems to talk about himself alot, and it gets to me. he lacks asking me questions sometimes- such as how my day was, what did i do , etc. he does sometimes, but others, its like hello!!
on the positive side, he doesnt interrupt you, he doesnt have to be right when in convo with you, and he does listen and he does care...but maybe he just doesnt think to ask more questions. he always seems to bring the convo to something about him. like we would talk about my car and he would be like well my car has been great, blah blah.
hes not self centered, conceited, etc. how do i get him to think about asking more q's?
hope this isnt too confusing
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Old 9th December 2003, 8:09 PM   #2
Tony T
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He does sound a bit self centered. You may need to point this habit out to him if it bothers you that much. Otherwise, you can be certain that all the days of your lives, no matter what topic you may want to discuss, he will turn it to himself. I know several people like that myself and they've been that way for years.

It sounds like he's got a lot of great qualities. Since you already know all about yourself, it shouldn't be any big loss if he talks mostly about himself. Unfortunately, when you learn everything about him there is to know and there's no mystery left for you to wonder about...you'll get bored and he'll have to find another lady to soak with the details of his life.

Try to work on this by bringing it to his attention. When he turns a topic to himself, turn it back. Offer you own opinions and information about yourself if he doesn't ask. You can make this work if you just have patience and the determination to put up with it.
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Old 9th December 2003, 8:23 PM   #3
lost_in_chgo
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Are you letting him do all the communicating?
Try talking more about your interests/issues.

If he is driving the conversation back to himself, he is not actively listening. This is common.
He has to make an effort to stay on the topic, and he may be unaware that he is even doing it.
He may also be preoccupied or worried about the things he talks about.

http://www.colorado.edu/conflict/pea...nt/activel.htm
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Old 9th December 2003, 8:31 PM   #4
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i will be sure to bring this up, i just dont want to turn into a nag about it. but hes great, loves to work things out and talk it all out, so in time, thanks tony, this will work out.
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