[Tonysweetie]

Hi, this could be kinda long so please bare with me....I've been with my bf for 2 years as of a week ago. Were so in love and so happy together. We don't fight a lot and we both know that were going to be together forever. Neither of us have been married b4 and neither of us have any kids. Well about 4 or 5 months ago I saw a ring that I was absoultly in love with. I wanted him to buy right then and there and put it on my finger but of course I didn't ask that. Anyways..While I was on vacation with my family in July he went back and bought the ring, how I know his? Well hehe, I "accidently" saw it in his room and I overread something saying that he bought me a ring. Well after I saw it I was for sure that he would propose! We've been talking about marriage for quite some time. Well our 2 years was a week ago and I had told him months ago that Disney is my dream proposal spot and so we went to Disney (I assumed this is when he was going to do it) well the whole day came and left and no proposal! I was so upset! I had looked forward to it for like 3 months and it got shot down. So I got over it and now I'm just patiently waiting. Well just the other day he tol dme that he wants to join the airforce when he graduates college next December, and he wants us to get married b4 he leaves. I agreed and told him Iwould follow him into the airforce and go whereever he goes! So I asked him when he was going to go talk to a recruiter and all that and he said, like a few months b4 I graduate. I was like WHAT?! I'm thinking he was gonna say like next summer b/c if he wants to get married b4 he leaves that means we'll get married between Fall of 04 and spring of 05 and thats not a lot of time to propose, plan wedding and get married, were talking like 4 months here. Sooo I'm kinda hoping that he'll propose like within the next month or so and we can start planning the wedding by the beginning of the spring time so we have almost a year, but he told me that he doesn't want to propose until he feels not so stressed over school and work. But I'm like that could be another year! I've been waiting a year and 1/2 already. I don't pressure him at all b/c frankly I never metion that I'm getting impatient or I doin't ask when when when all the time. But I'm really starting to break down and get impatient. I metioned last night what he would do if I proposed? and he said say yes but he would rather me not b/c he wants to do it. He has no idea I know he has this ring, and its killing me! I want to start planning our wedding now instead of 4 months before the big day but he doesnt want to start planning until he proposes! ugh! what should I do? I don't want to ask him b/c I don't want him to think he's being pressured, b/c he's not, and of course I don't want him to do it and regret it or not do it when he isn't ready, but if he isn't ready why would he tell me that he wants to marry me within the next year to year and 1/2? I don't understand, will he ever propose?! Sorry for being so long! Thanks for readig. This was more of a venting thing, but feel free to reply! God Bless!!!!!

[Arabess]

I know you are having a hard time due to your friend who keeps aggravating the problem with his comments (from your other post). Maybe it would be a big statement to your boyfriend if you actually stood up for the relationship by getting rid of the "other" guy. Your friend ship with him will NOT move the relationship along because your boyfriend is jealous. If anything, ESPECIALLY if he is considering a military career, he needs to know he can totally trust you to protect the relationship you share. He may be gone for extended periods of time....and I think he'd feel better about it if he was FOR SURE you aren't going to be friends with another guy who is obviously trying to break you up.

As far as pushing him for marriage....DON'T! Forget worrying about the wedding plans. It's just a whole lot of money spent on ONE DAY. Instead, focus on your relationship and the kind of wife you want to be for him for the rest of your years together. You can ALWAYS pull a wedding together, but a marriage takes HARD WORK!!

Since he sounds like a "planner".....I don't think he'll wait last minute to pop the question. It seems to me he has a "time frame" in mind. ENJOY just being his girlfriend. Once you are married....you will never be his girlfriend again. It's a special time you need to fill with special memories. Once the kids come along....you will look back on THIS phase of your relationship and often wish you were BACK THERE! HAHAHAHA!

Calling yourself "Tonysweetie".....that is soooooo nice!!!! I like it.

[moimeme]

It also sounds to me like he has a plan of his own. He might be considering another date - maybe Christmas or New Year's or Valentine's Day. It sounds as though he wants to surprise you - to have proposed at Disney would have been something you expected. Don't stress about it any more and all of a sudden one day he'll surprise you - and you'll need to look totally surprised and pleased rather than 'it's darn well about time'

[Tonysweetie]

Thats cool that you both posted here too, haha. Anyways thanks again for the replies. I'm trying very hard to be patient and not pressure him. I keep all the impatience and pressure to myslef, which I think its best. As far as the other guy who is so called my friend, Tony knows of him and knows what he's been doing but it doesn't bother him to much. Well it bothers him but since I've stood up to him a few times he knows I wouldn't do anything with this guy. But thanks again for your feedback I'll just keep waiting utnil he does it!