I like a girl who I know for a fact doesn't like me. I met her the day I moved up to college, and instantly took some interest in her. She lives on my hall, and I ended up becoming very good friends with her within weeks. I wanted to make a move, but I started seeing her flirting openly with other guys. She was laughing, and going to see them all the time, and she never acted like that at all with me, so I got discouraged. She eventually stopped seeing these guys, and I thought maybe I could try to tell her how I felt then. But everytime I tried to advance, or say something, she repelled me. Eventually, it got to the point where she wouldn't let me touch her, even in jest; she wouldn' let me sit neat her, or even go in her room. I didn't even think I was being that obvious, but apparently she figured it out, and was really uncomfortable with it.
I made the logical move, and tried to get over her. I started looking for other girls, and trying to ignore her. But it's really hard when we live so close, and have so many friends in common. Plus, suddenly she's acting really nice to me again; she wants to hang out all the time, she doesn't care if I'm in her room, and she's laughing at my jokes, which she never had before. I'm really confused now; either she's feeling bad for me, or she had a sudden change of heart, or she thinks I don't like her anymore and is ready to just be friends with me. Whichever it is, it's not helping me get over her at all; now I like her more.
I don't want to like her anymore; I really just want to be friends now, and find someone else, but she's very attractive, and everything I'm looking for in a girl as far as personality. How do I get over her? I'm worried this will ruin our friendship.

[Arabess]

I think you should make the determination if you want her for a friend or a girlfriend....and let her know either way.

Maybe you are feeling that you would rather keep her as a friend than lose her as a girlfriend.....which is undertandable. However, how will you feel when she DOES find a boyfriend who isn't you...because she didn't know how you felt about her?

I know it's easier said than done....to tell someone how you feel about them. In your case though, you are taking a great risk by not being totally honest with yourself or her.

[subtitled]

yeh, it sounds pretty awkward, but i think you're going to have to make a certain action either way, not just linger in between.

Either totally give up on her as anything more than a friend, or tell her straight up you like her.

I think the latter is probably better, even if it does hurt, because after the pain goes, you will feel so much less confused and can move on for yourself.