[uongy]

i broke with my gf 8 wks ago and im still getting upset aboit what happened.it was a LDR and im pretty sure that da distance was the thing that made her end it with me.the thing that hurt also was the fact that she started going out with someone else straight after.

i know she missed me loads when she went with me.i know she loved me and i know that me and her could have made each other happy if we were closer.

ive tried loads of ways to forget about the break up like hanging out with my friends and keeping busy.but i still get very very upset still.i can relate nearly everything to her and this gets to me.i often cry about it.especially if im alone.

a friend of mine suggested that i cal her one last time to get some things straight in my head(closure).is there anything else can you can suggest?
thx for help.

[BraveGirl]

I'm so sorry Uongy. All I can say is I do know how you feel. (If you read all the stuff I have written trying to feel better about it, you'll see there are others of us feeling that immense pain.)

I cry all the time. I guess that is natural. And yes, everything relates to the other person. Everything.
You are doing the right thing seeing other people. As someone said to me, even if you come home and cry, at least you have had a short respite from crying.

But one positive thing about what you have written, is that you are asking how to survive moving on. If you are thinking like that, and not 'How can I have her back', you are already a big step ahead. If you are half way to accepting, you are further than I am. So well done!

At the moment I look at people in the street, on the bus... and think, at some point in their life they have loved and been heartbroken, and here they are now, past it. So maybe everyone is right after all, that time does makes things easier. We just have to get through that time. Maybe if we accept that we will be utterly miserable for a while, we can stop panicking and stop wishing it were otherwise.

By the way, if you feel you need to contact her, I would suggest a carefully written letter first. It is less threatening and you can really consider what you want to say.

[Vivid_29]

Take in what Bravegirl said because it is good advice.

It's good to see that you are being good to yourself with staying busy and hanging out with your friends. That's the best remedy. What you are going through is temporary and you'll get by this.