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Good idea to move in with him and start a family or should I wait for his divorce

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The Other Man / Woman The other side of the story: Support and discussion for those who find themselves involved with a committed partner.

Old 11th September 2003, 11:02 AM   #1
Orchid
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Need some advice...please help

I have been dating my boyfriend for over 7 months now. Since day one he has been talking about wanting to start a family with me and spending the rest of our lives together. Why not, I'd think? He's just the right person for me the way I feel and have felt since I met him.

Now he recently purchased a house and he's been giving me hints as to move in with him. I really want all of that...start a new life and a family with the man I really love. But problem is, is that he is still married with his wife. So don't get me wrong ok? He was married while we were dating but wasn't living with her anymore. He lived in his apartment that he shared with his brother.

Is it a good idea to move in with him and start a family or should I wait until he gets the divorce? I believe that waiting for him to get the divorce is the better way to handle this, but I would like your opinion too. You see, I want to get married first before I move in and do anything, but he can't marry me if he's already married to someone else.

If he really loves me and really means every word he said, it shouldn't be hard for him to file for a divorce and live the life that he wants to live with me. It shouldn't be much of a sacrifice for him, right?

Thank you for your replies. I appreciate it.
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Old 11th September 2003, 11:06 AM   #2
rush
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Join Date: Sep 2003
Location: n.tex
Posts: 72
wait

please [wait] for the divorce before you do anything if he realy loves you he will understand. god bless
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Old 15th September 2003, 7:14 PM   #3
JulieHoping
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Join Date: Sep 2003
Location: Austin, Tx(just moved here to be with him)
Posts: 4
Red face I did it

I recently reunited with my old highschool sweetheart of twenty years ago. We fell instantly in love again with one small glitch, he was married.

He separated with her and moved in with me and we have been mostly happy. The only problem is that he has not gotten the divorce yet. It has only been since February and his reason is that he has no money to pay the lawyer since she already got a court order for him to pay all the bills.

This is the truth, he is not BSing me on this.

I am starting to wonder if it will ever happen though.

So I am hoping my experience might help you and maybe I will get some advice from others out there.
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Old 9th October 2003, 11:49 PM   #4
LuckyStar
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Join Date: Oct 2003
Location: USA
Posts: 31
There is always two side to every story. Don't believe the hipe.
I've been seperated from my husband approx. five years now. After 9/11 I became unemployed. Although we decided that we should divorce, i asked, if we could hold off until I get myself back on my feet, I decided to go back to school and I believe it best to be covered under his health insurance. In addition, the ultimate reason for the seperation was he had an affair with another woman. So you can only imagine what he's been telling her for the past five years and I'm pretty sure she's probably wondering what's with the divorce.

In otherwords, never get involved, move in, expose your children, open your heart and soul or your finances to a married man/woman.

Invest your time and effort into yourself.
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