lately i've noticed just how much my bickering, nitpicking, arguing, defensiveness, opinionated self has been causing some problems between b'f and me.
the problem is i don't know how to shut my big mouth up! i feel justified in answering or what he calls hassling him about things i call just asking questions about.
how does one shut their mouth to keep peace without feeling this built up tension from doing so, any ideas?
YOU ASK: "how does one shut their mouth to keep peace without feeling this built up tension from doing so, any ideas?"
There are appropriate and constructive ways of discussing things. If your parents didn't go over this information with you and you can't figure it out, perhaps a counsellor can help you. It's not rocket science at all. I'm sure you know how to do it. I think there must be deeper problems of frustration and other psychological issues and coping skills that need addressing.
You may have some mood swing problems associating with an imbalance in your blood chemistry that your doctor can help you with. There's also other possibilities such as depression and problems associated with PMS. Get a doctor to check you out thoroughly to rule out any kind of problems like this.
You just have to learn how to get along with people by listening to them and not judging what they say. And you need to learn how to express yourself in ways that aren't harsh and not let trivial stuff get to you. It's actually quite easy once you get the hang of it.
thanks tony for the response. i think too that part of it is wanting to control things that he thinks or others think, not just him, you know by telling my side of what i think in hopes of getting the other person to see my side and change their minds.
i tried yesterday evening just keeping my lip zipped and not saying a word against what he said just so i would not be so angry and annoyed with myself for the back and fourth exchanges this brings that are not comfortable.
lately too i have been extremely easily irriated and angry like. it takes little to nothing to just set me off with frustration.
like when trying to do something on the computer or work or where ever or what ever and the instant i have a problem i get so mad and want to throw things.
Please note: The suggestions and advice offered on this web site are opinions only and are not to be used in the place of professional psychological counseling or medical advice. If you or someone close to you is currently in crisis or in an emergency situation, contact your local law enforcement agency or emergency number.
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