[Butterflies]

I dated my ex boyfriend for a year. We broke up five months ago.
Well he broke up with me, we didn't end mutually. I was completely devastated. I would try to understand why, when he said "I know we'll get married." He made me think that I would never have to look for another boyfriend. Little did I know. So, since we've broken up we've had a few moments when we fell back on each other. But I was always wanting more and he didn't see it that way. So I finally got to the point where I wasn't gonna let him hurt me anymore. It worked for a while but he just has this hold on my heart. We hadn't hooked up for almost two months and last night, It happened and all those butterflies in my stomach came rushing back. What am I to do?

[nicholeprobst]

Butterflies,

I can totally sympathize with you...but my relationship was a four year relationship and we still have to live together till our lease is up this May!

I can't figure it out either...maybe we could chat and figure it out together.

Either way...I hope it works out for ya and keep me posted!

Nichole

[PurpleAngel]

I am sorry Butterflies, I am not going to be as sympathetic. It saddens me to see women put themselves in situations that can be avoided that cause them confusion and pain.

I would try to understand why, when he said "I know we'll get married."

This is a head f@ck! Don’t buy that sh#t! Sorry I hate men that do that. Don’t listen to them, why is he leaving you if he is so sure you’ll get married!

He made me think that I would never have to look for another boyfriend.

NO HE DID NOT! You thought it! You can never be sure what happens in the future. YOU stopped looking for a boyfriend, he did not make you think anything, you thought it off your own bat babe!

since we've broken up we've had a few moments when we fell back on each other. But I was always wanting more and he didn't see it that way. So I finally got to the point where I wasn't gonna let him hurt me anymore.

GOOD be strong, don’t let someone have something that they said they didn’t want by leaving you. Have self respect and say NO!

It worked for a while but he just has this hold on my heart.

He does not at all have a hold of your heart, you are the only person who has that power. YOU are the one that has an attachment to him and wont let go! Don’t give away your power by saying that someone ELSE has the power to control your feelings, let me tell you they do not. YOU are the only person that can govern your own emotions, feelings and reactions to things.

We hadn't hooked up for almost two months and last night, It happened and all those butterflies in my stomach came rushing back. What am I to do?

STOP SEEING HIM! Can't you see its not healthy and will only cause you more confusion, pain and angst.

My advise to you is move on, you can find someone heaps better, someone that wants to be with you not only for a night of hot passion but also for a day outing, movies, a morning hug, a shoulder to cry on, just someone who wants to support and love you! You need to be strong, don’t let anyone take advantage of you, and as I said before you are the only one that can say NO!

Good Luck
~PurpleAngel~

[kinziepooh]

Of couse you "fall back on eachother" He's a man, he wants sex, he probably can't get laid cause he's a total looser (he didn't see how wonderful you are) and comes around cause he knows you'll give it up cause you are in love and clingy and all the other stuff. Don't be confused he's not, he knows exactly what to say to keep you coming, or at least himself. This is a class "F" looser. Sweety, you keep falling into his trap that there is a future, and let me tell you, there is, and he means it when he says that there might still be a chance, but the kind of future he sees and you see are different, you are thinking fiance' and he's thinking booty call future. Your future together is not about going to a honeymoon, it's about the honeymoon suite at the nearest cheap motel, and if i'm right it might even be over at his nasty place. Does he go oever to your house all the time or you his, but i bet you guys don't go to both places, visiting both houses put you in eachothers lives, he has to be in your world and you in his, but seducers usually pick one or the other, decide what you want to be loved or f#@&ed, because that is all he's offering in the way of future plans. Think about it, either you trash him or he's trashing you, think about what he tells his friends about you????