[daineval]

Hi all...

I'm looking for some advice on how to deal with a situation with my partner's sister. I am currently paying rent in my partner's father's house and, for the sake of the story, "Jane" also lives there with us.

She is either oblivious or knows exactly what she's doing and does not care. She often takes and eats things that are not hers without asking and no logical discussions can be had with her as she does not listen. In any conversation no matter the topic she always interjects by saying something about herself or turning every discussion to be about her or her boyfriend, and if that does not work, her favourite and overused line is "I'm so depressed". Anything and everything can make her "depressed"... Oh that TV advert makes me depressed. That actress makes me so depressed. Oh the internet is not working and I can't get on facebook today? I'm so depressed.

We do not have much in common, but a couple of years ago before she started work in a supermarket, I used to like her for her sense of morals and integrity. Since then she has lost every ounce of that by sleeping around with multiple men cheating on her boyfriend. She'd started going out with an 18 y/o boy because she thought he was really attractive and has left her existing b/f waiting as he thinks that they are on a "break". While with this 18 y/o she has now confessed that she prefers his best friend as they have more in common so she said she'll make a move on him soon.

We have all be living in this house for several months now and they have a violent teenage brother who is on drugs and uses intimidation in order to get what he wants. No one in the house wanted him to live there, but Jane insisted that he does and told him so. When she saw that others in the house did not want him to live there, she forced it upon us by letting him in and getting him to start decorating one of the rooms. Once after a violent fight with my partner did their father put a stop to it and after he stole £50 from Jane, she has backed off her plans to push him upon us, but you can tell that she is still determined.

To cut a long story short, because of her ways, I cannot stand her and at the moment I just ignore her. If she says Hi to me I will respond, but I will take it no further. But because the others in the house would rather talk to her when we are all together it causes a bit of tension because as soon as she is there I do not join in with any of the conversations (mainly about Jane) and I can tell that others are awkward because they would rather "keep the peace".

What should I do? Should I continue ignoring her or do I indulge her with her life of denial where she thinks that she is the victim in every situation and that it is always others that have wronged her? I am not the sort of person who dislike people behind people's backs then pretend that I am friends with them, but I have learnt to pretend with a colleague at work who I cannot stand in order to get work done... but I feel like I am being fake and the acting tires and stresses me out. Why should I need to pretend while I'm at work and while I am at home?

I know that I need to move out of here and I will do so as soon as I have paid off my debts and in the better position, but in the mean time, do I continue to ignore her or do something else?

Any help will be much appreciated... thanks in advance.

[ADF]

There is only one way to sort all of this out: move.

What the heck is going on when the whole bunch of you--presumably adults--are living with your partner's daddy? Absurd. There's something very weird about this.

Get outy of that place asap. Make that your #1 priority. The rest will take care of itself.