[ksimion]

When one person decides they need to take a break (few months) from their current relationship of a few years, because of a feeling of distance between each other, what are the most important things each person needs to do during their time apart? What shouldn’t you do? How do you overcome the awkwardness when you do want to get back together? And, should you worry about what others may think about your decision to take a “break”?

[Tony T]

YOU ASK: "When one person decides they need to take a break (few months) from their current relationship of a few years, because of a feeling of distance between each other, what are the most important things each person needs to do during their time apart?"

DUH!!! You want to get away from each other because of feeling a distance between each other. Wow, a totally new concept!!!

Getting away from each other to get closer to each other is like putting ice cream in the oven to freeze it. Where in heaven's name did you get this idea.

The two of you are so out of it with this idea I strongly urge you to seek professional counselling. With the problem you have, a separation will largely drive the two of you further apart...or only create false closeness for a short time if the two of you got back together.

You relationship is in serious danger. If you're growing apart, that may be a sign it wasn't meant to be. But if both of you have a sense you really want to help it heal....get help from a professional counsellor. This separation idea is not a good one.

[Dee]

Hey .... you think that's bad ... my husband wants to separate for a whole year .. without allot of contact!!

I don't know ..... to me that seems like he wants out!!

Dee

[Georgiao]

In response to Tony's "non-answer" I think a time apart provides some needed mental focus about who you are, what you need and whether the relationship can provide you with some of your needs. I think that during this time apart, you need to focus on yourself, your needs, desires and aspirations for the future. I don't mean a self absorbed, self centred manner but one that examines what you are all about and whether this union can exist harmoniously with both emotional welfares intact. I tend not to judge the merits or pitfalls of what a separation means for the two parties. You may need some quiet time within the marriage to assess and review the union, your happiness and your future together. Good luck on your decisions.