[lost47]

Hi, Im 47 fit healthy active excercise reg etc.. My wife is beutiful and I love her. The problem is she doesn't make time for love-making (I phrase it that way because it is more than just sex to me). I have tried dinners cards etc. I am very physical with her, always touching, kissing, carressing etc. She just does not seem interested. What gives?

[Just A Girl2]

So is it that she doesn't seem to want to "make time" for lovemaking or is the problem that even when there is time, she's not interested? (cuz those are two separate problems)

You say you give her plenty of kissing, caressing, etc.......but in the context of what? Only when you're wanting sex *OR* are you affectionate with her like this at other times too? I ask because speaking from experience, a lot of women get really turned off of sex if the only time their guy is kind/sweet/affectionate is when he wants sex.....but shows her no affectionate for the other hours in the day/week, etc.

Does she work full time out of the home? Is she stressed and overloaded from working long hours?

Do you help her around the house and make her feel that she's part of a "team" versus her being the one who's solely responsible for the upkeep of the house/chores/paying bills/cooking/cleaning/shopping/raising the kids (if you have kids)?

What age is your wife?

Has she recently had a baby/do you have small children that are taking up a lot of her time and energy?

Depending on her age, could she be going through menopause and experiencing a lack of sex drive due to hormonal changes? (if so, you might want to read up on Menopause, and discuss this possibility with her, and ask if she'd be willing to visit her doctor to discuss options for dealing with menopause (hormone replacement therapy, herbal supplements, diet changes, etc)

Other than when you're wanting to make love, are you making your wife feel loved/cherished/appreciated/desired/respected/admired? The desire for sex starts in the brain.......and if a woman is feeling unappreciated, only receives affection and romance when her guy wants sex (but not at other times), worn out from trying to run the home/work a job/raise the kids/maintain other commitments, it's obviously going to affect her sex drive.

Is she on any medications? A lot of anti-depressants can lower sex drive (and there are other ones out there that have less of this effect)

Does she have any health problems that could be making her feel tired/poorly? (thyroid problems, diabetes, high blood pressure, depression, fibromyalgia, vaginal dryness due to hormonal changes (makes sex painful sometimes), etc etc?