Inlaws

Babygirl8385 · 6th November 2009, 5:14 PM

Ive been married almost a year now, we are living with my husbands mother and uncle, economy crash ... killed our house dreams

theres been non stop problems with them for 2 years, we pay 1000 a month for rent, we buy our own food that they rape, and etc many things that are so not fair. his mother hates me, and doesnt hesitate to show it, they try to control what we do in our room, that we pay for! .. and she just overall complains to him whenever she feels it necessary, she also comes into our room whenever she wants taking my pills, prescribed pain killers, and food whatever she wants, goes thru my personal things, and Lies to his face about it, im torn ... my husband talks to her but she is so stubborn and stupid, privacy is a big issue and has been forever in my life ... any ideas?

pollswolls · 6th November 2009, 5:21 PM

My goodness - If you're paying $1000 a month rent to live there, why can't you pay $1000 - or less & live somewhere else. Even if it's a small studio apt. Anything would be better than dealing with her. (Monster-In-Law)
AND - You don't say this, but I hope your husband is standing up to her somewhat.

I personally believe that living with inlaws is a marriage killer! (Happened to my son) Especially if everyone can't get along & have some sort of normalcy in the household.

This darn economy crisis has taken it's toll on far too many people. {Hugs} I hope you both find an answer SOON!

Babygirl8385 · 6th November 2009, 5:26 PM

thanks for the reply!, well i have a son as well, so we need something with at least 2 bedrooms, and no banks here are lending, and we have several applications out for apartments, just a waiting game, we are mostly staying at this point because his mother lost her job, and his uncle only works 2 days a week

so we are helping them ...

Love2love7 · 6th November 2009, 5:28 PM

Sorry to hear what you're going thru.
But as long as you're living under her roof HER rules are to be followed. If you're paying rent, she should be more considerate and understanding. But unfortunately she's not.
Has your husband talked to her about what's bothering you guys?

I would do whatever it takes to get out of there. Get a second job and stop spending less money on things you really don't need, it will totally be worth it once you're under YOUR own roof.

Babygirl8385 · 6th November 2009, 5:30 PM

he stands up to her, and it ends in a big fight, so we try to avoid any conflict .. we are saving.... tons, we need a new car on top of everything else, so he can get to work and back ... i hate the situation .. its making me wonder if i should stay around and keep taking it

Jinxies · 6th November 2009, 5:51 PM

I would have to say that staying in that situation is only going to lead to unhappiness, mistrust and eventually the end of your relationship. Saving money and working on future plans is very important and shouldn't be diminished, but you are letting those plans rule your lives.

$1,000 a month is a tidy sum of money and I'd start looking for places with short term rent options and find a place to move into asap.

The situation you are in is not good for a new marriage.

hopeful1980 · 6th November 2009, 5:57 PM

Formulate and exit strategy. You have to get out of their. It's one thing if you're renting your own place, but to pay so much money and have to share a roof with other people who don't respect you and your stuff - that's really throwing money down the drain.

Love2love7 · 6th November 2009, 5:59 PM

If you really love your husband and want to make it work you should definitely stay. If both of you are working hard and saving money to move out and get a new car I don't see why you shouldn't stay.

You guys will overcome the situation, it will take time and a lot patience but once you're out of HER house you will definitely appreciate your privacy and love each other even more. Just keep on pushing for your husband and little son. You guys will be fine