[Lost&Found]

I mentioned this in an earlier thread, but it wasn't the topic and I wanted to ask this separately. My GF told me she no longer wanted a "relationship" with me, not serious anyway, and no longer wanted to be considered girlfriend and boyfriend. BUT we could still date and she would go out with me if I asked her on a date. I asked her if she was breaking up with me and she got angry and said no, we were just going to start over. Well I was completely heartbroken and crushed. I'm confused. If someone tells you they no longer want to be your girlfriend isn't that the same as breaking up?

[Dexter Morgan]

Starting over is usually when one person is cheating and wants to sweep it under the rug. That way if it is brought up in conversation, it can be said, "but that was BEFORE we started over"

She doesn't want to be in a relationship with you? because she wants other guys, but wants to be able to mess around with you.

so hey, if you don't mind being a booty call, and can use her for sex....then go for it...she made the rules.

Otherwise, I wouldn't waste my time with her if I were you. Getting mad at you for simply asking if you are breaking up? I think she needs to be put on the curb and she needs to know that she can't screw with your feelings like this....unless you just want to mess around and don't care that is.

[Lost&Found]

Well right now I do care, and I don't want to be in a casual relationship with her - it would be too painful for me. So I'm considering it done - maybe once I get over it and I can just be casual with her, I might give her a call and see what happens. I might get some - lol!

[trueblue72ny]

Yes, that is the same as breaking up. She is just trying to ease the blow. Don’t be fooled by it. you are not together anymore. sorry. It sucks. Your best bet in my humble opinion is to consider it done. Unless she says she wants you and her to be known as a couple again.

[Lost&Found]

That's exactly as I thought. In fact I told her the whole "we can still go on dates" was a way to make the break up easier for her. She told me to stop guilt tripping her and that now she changed her mind and I wouldn't even get the chance to try again!

I went NC for a day and she already broke it. Today she sent me a text about picking up a bag of clothes she left at my house and when would be a good time. I text back that I didn't know and that I wasn't ready to see her right now and "don't worry you will get your stuff back." She said "never mind", that she would just forget about her clothes and wouldn't send me anymore texts, then "sorry". Crazy exes indeed!

[littlebittle]

i don't know, my ex and i are sort of going through something similar. we both really like each other and have feelings for each other, but a relationship isn't in the cards for us at this point. a big part of it is that i got really anxious about getting serious with someone, and i ended up pushing him away. that made him scared, and we ended up just sort of falling apart. the thing is, i like him so much, but i'm just not ready.

i think you need to protect yourself. when my ex broke up with me, he wanted to continue holding hands and going on dates. it just didn't work because we weren't on the same page. we both ended up really hurt. maybe if you give your ex a little bit of space, she'll have a better understanding of what she wants from you. but i think that being in this uncertain limbo will only end up stressing you out and causing problems.

good luck!