[mface]

looking for some quick advice from married people in particular.

i've been with my fiancee for almost two years, and friends before that for a year. when we met, we were dating other people, but had unspoken feelings we were supposed to be together. neither of us cheated on our exes, and so our relationship got started on the right foot.

throughout our relationship, i have never questioned that he was the one i wanted to be with. we have very much in common (sense of humor, values, religious fervor), and he is a man of very strong character, someone people look up to for a number of reasons. so do i, of course. and everything romantic between us(although we are waiting till marriage for sex) has been excellent.

two months ago, we became engaged. again, no doubts. but then we went to a marriage retreat for our church, and i was oddly struck by the seriousness of what we are planning to undertake. i say oddly, because i felt that i was taking marriage very seriously, but now i feel very stressed about having a good marriage or not messing up.

and here's the oddest thought, the one i'm looking for advice to clear things up: it occured to me that, although my future hubby has all the qualities i need in a man, he's actually very different than what i suppose would be my fantasy guy. i used to picture myself with some sort of highly cultured academic-type, and while my guy is very very bright, he's more like a regular person or a guy from the neighborhood. sort of. even there, he stands out as special or different or whatever.

anyway, i'm upset, because this has made me feel snobbish. and i don't want to end up resenting my guy because of this later on.

so, advice? is this a blip i should ignore? am i just being paranoid? is what we already have enough for a good marriage?