First, besides the fact that to many women according to them it's something symbolic, aren't you happy you are already going to marry him and everything about him stays in your memory?? That's enough already.. You already have him with you and affection can be shown in other ways besides them buying you stuff....
Rings, they just objects anyways. It can be lost and then let's say the marriage doesn't work out or wedding is cancel...so much for him wasting time on a ring that it will now serve as no point at all...
Second, why mostly a white dress. I understand if it was a religious marriage which off course I'll never have as I'm atheist but in a government marriage, you can wear anything you want to yet still go in that dress. Think it all started with Queen Victoria and then all women started copying...
Then again, I don't like dresses...
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It's just traditional I guess. Most women when they were kids fantasized about getting married with the really long white dress and the horse and carrige and everything, and it's something that still appeals to them when they're older.
The whole wedding thing is more for women really than for men, (like flower arranging or sewing, lol).
Rings, they just objects anyways. It can be lost and then let's say the marriage doesn't work out or wedding is cancel...so much for him wasting time on a ring that it will now serve as no point at all...
Um, if you are thinking the marriage might not work before you propose, then don't propose yet, the ring's resale value should be the last of your worries.
Life is all about symbolism, from before you are born to your funeral. It doesn't make one a greedy, materialistic bastard for appreciating some of these symbols. Nothing is less attractive than a stingy bastard who accuses everyone else of materialism, while he indulges his "savings" on useless crap from Walmart. Talk about reading materialism wrong.
They are important because the businesses that make money from them have spent decades in advertising making sure that you (the consumer) find them important.
__________________ ...they think everything is smiles and sweetness and flowers, when there is something bitter to taste. And to pretend there isn't is foolish. -- edie sedgwick
It's just traditional I guess. Most women when they were kids fantasized about getting married with the really long white dress and the horse and carrige and everything, and it's something that still appeals to them when they're older.
The whole wedding thing is more for women really than for men, (like flower arranging or sewing, lol).
Yes.. I honestly think it's more about the 'bling-bling'.. the white dress..the diamond, the honeymoon...flowers etc.. I have never once heard a guy saying.. 'oh my-my.. can't wait to go with my daddy to get my tuxedo, I'm sooo excited'...
The white dress and the big diamond is a big 'show-off' day for the bride.. the groom is just following behind.. he can't argue too much.. it's HER day... He will be seen as a selfish 'jerk' if he tries to put his .02..
Remember, he wants sex on his honeymoon...
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They are important because the businesses that make money from them have spent decades in advertising making sure that you (the consumer) find them important.
good point.. the same women who usually say that Valentine's Day is too commercial.. with the flowers, chocolates and cards... (better to say that than to say .. 'he didn't get me anything' )
They are important because the businesses that make money from them have spent decades in advertising making sure that you (the consumer) find them important.
Which I find worthless... How about if I just want to wear a nice outfit which would be khati jean, shirt and my favorite tennis....without any ring whatsoever....... See you can waste your money of buying me a dress and nice and I'll just be telling you to return it back...
It's just traditional I guess. Most women when they were kids fantasized about getting married with the really long white dress and the horse and carrige and everything, and it's something that still appeals to them when they're older.
Yea typical Cinderella stories... I do believe in getting married but not in the so called ''traditional style'', it'll be my way.. If I don't like dresses nor rings then no one can force me to wear one[/QUOTE]
Yeah, If I was to get married (which I never will) it wouldn't be in the traditional way. It'd just be normal clothes at a registery office or something. No fuss, no butterflys in the stomach, no crowds of people, just easy and simple.
The only reason my partner and I will marry is to allocate finances more constructively (married person's tax, pensions, that kind of thing....)
Otherwise, it's pointless.
I know he's committed.
He knows I'm committed.
I shall probably have a Buddhist blessing, and dress the way I want, not the way convention 'dictates'.
I told my Roman Catholic mother of our intended, low-key, informal, and unceremonial plans and she said - "Good for you!"
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My engagement and wedding rings are important to me and I love them, and my husband's ring is important to him as well, but that's us, we appreciate the symbolism. Obviously you don't, and that's fine, for you. It seems like you take other people's rings kind of personally, which seems a little odd to me. I have known couples who were married but didn't wear rings, for various reasons. Other people might have questioned it occasionally but I don't think anyone considered it a big deal.
My own ceremony was small, short, civil, outdoors, and I wore jeans and a nice ivory tunic. My stepdaughter was both the best girl and the maid of honor, the 'best maid'. Afterward we had a BBQ on the beach and ate a lot of cheesecake. My rings aren't 'traditional,' either, as I don't care much for diamonds or the diamond industry.
If you're going to question the trappings, why not question the institution of marriage? If so, don't bother getting married.
Why do people wear red on Valentine's Day and gift each other? Shouldn't they be happy with the love between them?
Why do people get together with family and all loved ones at Christmas, gifting each other?
Shouldn't they just be happy that they have each other?
All of this traditionalism is meaningless to anyone who doesn't subscribe to it. That's cool if it's who you are. It's also just as cool, if people want to subscribe to traditionalism.
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ETA for "Bump" June 8, 2010!
Gestating in a life-satisfying way.
I don't ever want either an engagement or wedding ring, but that's because I just don't like wearing any sort of jewelry; I think it's a hassle more than anything else. Other than that, I would like to wear a nice--but not outrageously expensive--dress and have a low-key, intimate ceremony. Of course, all this is at the very least 5 years away...
When I get married (whenever that will be) I want a low key, small, and intimate wedding with a pretty white dress and flipflops and a cookout reception afterward. I used to want a big wedding, till I realized that a wedding isn't even really for the bride anymore, it's for your guests. You know the people who come to your wedding just for all the free food and drink they can get at your expense. So screw that! I want hot dogs and cheeseburgers at my wedding with a nice cake (and that's only because I love eating icing, but most people can't/won't eat it straight like I do).
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He will be seen as a selfish 'jerk' if he tries to put his .02.. 
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