[lora22]

Hey, I never post in this forum, but my mother is driving me nuts and I am out of patience. The important parts are bolded, because I have a feeling I might start ranting. Thanks if you make it to the end

Background:
First, I live near my parents, and I'm the only family close by. My dad has been traveling a lot lately for business, and will be gone for a week or more at a time.
Second, Friday I was given an assignment with a deadline of today. At the time I didn't think there was any need to work over the weekend; I should have had plenty of time.

My dad also left for a trip on Friday and can't make it back until next week.

Over the weekend my mother broke her arm.

So, I'm the one who got called to take her to the hospital, etc. I'm temporarily staying in their guest room to care for my mother until my dad gets back. My mother is very aware of my deadline, because I told her upfront that I would love to help her, but I do have work to do.

However, this has turned into me driving her around ALL day, EVERY day (doctor appointments, prescription fills, buying groceries, running errands, etc.), IN ADDITION to helping her bathe and dress, blow drying her hair, cleaning, cooking, caring for her dog and cat, and waiting on her (fetching drinks, another blanket, the tv remote, her book, and on and on). Basically she sits around checking her email, watching tv, reading a book, sleeping...I do everything for her, including things she can do for herself. The whole time she's making comments like "This is the last time I'll bother you, I know you have work to do." I'm not being at all impatient with her - no sighing, no eye rolling, I'm totally upbeat, asking her what she needs, if she needs anything, etc.

Because of this, I haven't been able to really start working until around 10pm every night - so I'm staying up late and nearly pulling all nighters in order to get my work done.

Finally, this morning I told her that I really need the morning to finish some things up. So I still got her going in the morning, got and refilled her coffee cup, etc. but have mostly been trying to wrap a few things up.

So apparently she decided to do some things for herself this morning. And I don't know what she was trying to do, but she was bitching and muttering and using the "f" word a lot before she got around to doing it. I didn't offer to help, because like I said, I needed to finish my work by noon today.

Anyways, so all of a sudden she starts screaming "F***er" and throwing things around in the kitchen, so I say "Mom what do you need help with?" And she goes "Nothing." And then she starts SOBBING and crying.

I don't understand why she has no problem asking me (or letting me) do things for her that she can do just fine on her own (basically waiting on her), but she won't ask me or let me do other things that she definitely CAN'T do for herself. It's like she's just feeling sorry for herself and wants to prove to herself that she has a right to feel sorry for herself. Other things that she can't do herself but HAVE to get done (like getting dressed or putting her sling on) she has no problem asking me to do, but the things that she CAN'T do and doesn't HAVE to do, she still tries to do on her own!!

I mean, the mailman just came to the door because there was too much mail for the mailbox, and instead of answering the door herself and giving him the outgoing mail herself, she asked me to do it!! It's not so much I have a problem with that, as I have a problem with the fact that she ASKED me to do that when she's perfectly capable of doing it herself, and she WOULDN'T ask me to do the other stuff for her, or let me help after I asked HER!!!

She's been getting constant visits, phone calls, cards, and flowers from other people, and my dad has offered to come home (he's in Europe on business!!), so I really don't think she should be feeling neglected in any way, plus I'm here waiting on her hand and foot, and spending all my time with her, listening to her complain and feel sorry for herself, and trying to be upbeat.

I don't understand my mother's attitude and I am totally out of patience with her, but I'm here until next week. I've also never broken my arm, so maybe this is something that's just so incredibly terrible even if you have someone to help you that I'm just not getting what she's going through??? Please help!