[Jordanjames]

I am wondering if anyone has ever heard of my situation before. I had a "friend" that I have known for about seven years. We were involved last year but now we are not. I have been attending a support group I have also got involved in volunteering because I want to meet new people and make new friends.


Anyway, last week was his birthday and I got to be honest I was kind of thinking of not calling him or seeing him on his birthday. Now I have been thinking I wish I never saw him on his birthday last week and I wish I did not buy him a card. Well at least I just got a card and I was smart enough not to purchase a gift for him.

The reason is in the past month of so he hasn't been calling, texting,seeing, or e-mailing me unless I contact him first. If I do contact him he will respond to my calls, texts, and see me.

I admit that last month I said to him "I am not sure I can be your friend anymore." I guess I was frustrated when I made that statement. Last week Tuesday I guess due to knowing him for a long time I contacted him for his birthday and I saw him.

We had dinner and split the bill. I am so glad I just bought him a birthday card and no gifts this year. We were smoking some weed in a park and then I mentioned something like "do you want to have fun" and he said "what make out?" And then he said "I don't think that's a good idea." The way he said it "I don't think it's a good idea" it is hard to explain he just sounded so crude the way he said it.

I guess just the way he said it hurt my feelings. I was high from the joint but that's not an excuse I wish I had not made the statement I made. Anyway, I haven't contacted him since last week Wednesday and I just don't want to.I wish I could just delete him from my life and not care about him anymore. I just feel like got to concentrate on myself now and I should not waste time worrying about him.

Anyway, after we finished smoking the joint and we got off the subway he says "I had a good time today". I was surprised he said that. Well I haven't contacted him since I saw him since Wednesday last week. I just turn my cell phone off at night before I go to bed. I have deleted his phone number from my phone. I also have deleted him from my facebook page as a friend a couple of weeks ago. I don't want to see what he's up to or what he is doing. I guess I have been wondering if I can really be his friend anymore?

Now that I think about it I don't know if I want him in my life anymore? I am trying to whole no contact thing again I just want to forget about him and move on with my life.