[lznhope]

I am hoping that the following information may help someone.

The following is taken from a book...although considered fiction, the writer has amazing thoughts on forgiveness. Somewhere in these writings, I found answers to some issues I was having. I hope it helps others.

I felt like I had forgiven my husband, but I was still plagued with anger, unable to forget and the list goes on...

The main character is having conversations with Papa (God) about an unforgiveable? situation. The answers from Papa are astounding... please read...

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"Today we are on a healing trail to bring closure to this part of your journey-not just for you, but for others as well. Today we are throwing a big rock into the lake and those ripples will reach places you will not expect."

"Forgiveness does not establish relationship."

"Forgiveness is first for you, the forgiver." answered Papa, "to release you from something that will eat you alive, that will destroy your joy and your ability to love fully and openly."

"I already told you that forgiveness does not create relationship. Unless people speak the truth about what they have done and change their mind and behavior, a relationship of trust is not possible. When you forgive someone you certainly release them from judgement, but without true change, no real relationship can be established."

"Forgiveness in no way requires that you trust the one you forgive. But should they finally confess and repent, you will discover a miracle in your own heart that allows you to reach out and begin to build between you a bridge of reconcilliation. And sometimes-and this may seem incomprehensible to you right now-that road may even take you to a miracle of fully restored trust."

"So is it alright if I am still angry?"

Papa answers "Absolutely! What he did was terrible. He caused incredible pain to many. It was wrong, and anger is the right response to something that is so wrong.
But don't let that anger and pain and loss you feel prevent you from forgiving him and removing your hands from his around is neck."

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These words were taken from a book called "The Shack" by William P. Young and is the #1 New York Times Bestseller.

Please understand I pulled key quotes from the book about forgiveness. There is more, just to long to add in this post!

I asked God to help me forgive my husband... I still felt pain and anger. He wasn't talking and that only made things worse. I even posted another "He's not talking" and last night, I went to a lady's fellowship and the teaching was on "Forgiveness" and the teacher read us these key excerpts from the book. It answered all my questions. I thought forgiveness would put the relationship in right standing. I believe you can forgive, but it IS up to the other partner to be honest. It is okay to feel anger of what was done that was wrong. I thought those feeling of anger meant I had not forgiven.
You can forgive AND still feel angry. You still need that "special person" in your life to be honest, so that you can move forward!!!

Hope this helps someone! It helped me! God Bless!

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Nothing makes us so lonely as our secrets.
-Paul Tournier