[Lucky555]

I still have unresolved feelings for the guy i previously was seeing for a while probably about 1.5 yrs in total.
not gf/bf because he didn't want to commit. Okay thats fine it was over.

Now what i am feeling now is betrayal type of feelings. I don't love him i swear. I don't want him back...but i feel like I rather not see him again. Like i am so disgusted by him that i rather not have anything do with him.

Now why do i feel like this? He lied to me throughout our time together and i think this is the worst. Now if someone mentions him i just don't want hear about him. i am completely tuned out.

I just want to forget him thats how disgusted i am. Its like everything i believe that was happening in the relationship and everything that i had asked him about, resulting in him lying to me about it or not telling me whole story.
I have to see him again in three weeks due a friend function...and just i feel like its going to be awkward how can i handle this...i think this is what is bothering me the most, having to see him again and just being totally no ok with him trying to talk to me..its like i dont want to be hearing from such a person like this again. I am afraid that i'll make things weird and people will notice..cuz i am going to avoid him as much as i can and i am going to stay away from him so he can't touch me or have any contact. hes going to notice and say something to a friend then its like uncomfortable for me and i want to remove myself from the situation completely.

I think yeah i got hurt and i am trying to avoid people like him. I think that he is not a person that i want to associate with, and i just hate having to hold back everything inside me and ACT like everything is ok between him and i and it is certainly not due to his lies. I can't accept him as a friend because no friend would deceive and lie to me like he did. I just hate having to pretend!

So i guess its this ...any suggestions!