www.nomarriage.com
Wow. I was referred to this website today for fun, and what I read really concerned me. I hope the opinions expressed on the site aren't majority opinion of American men toward American women. It's true we've been encouraged to be independent, to be able to take care of ourselves, to have our own minds and capabilities. But this doesn't mean all independent working women these days are feminist bullies who have extreme expectations of men. At least I don't think so. I walked away from an engagement just over a year ago to a man who would have seen me be financially secure for the rest of my life. I walked away because he was jealous and because our sex life was complely unfulfilling. I'm not one of these tripes who will use sex as a weapon, like this blog asserts. I want it, and lots of it, and I want it to be good for us both. *sigh*
But it made me wonder how many men are honest these days in their dating methods. My current situation has him backing away constantly with the "I'm seeking financial stability; I'm not looking for a serious relationship with anyone," which makes me wonder if he thinks this is a role he's supposed to fulfill despite the fact that I don't "need" him to take care of me. And then, should I feel bad because I really don't need a man, other than to provide me with companionship in life? That I want a man to walk beside me, rather than behind or in front of me? I'm not beneath domestic duties, and I'm not unwilling to compromise when it comes to what a man may want or need, so long as I don't have to sacrifice my total self for that purpose.
But this website made it seem as all women are primadonnas who drain men dry with no thoughts of reciprocating or meeting in the middle. It made me really sad. I'm in my early 30s, still single, and I'm wondering if it's because I don't fit that "little woman" mold. I do desire equality, but that is not the same thing as being a feminist. I don't want to bash men. I try my best to understand and meet in the middle, but that doesn't even seem to be good enough. If what is expressed on this site is the view many men hold, then why is a successful woman who still has a soft, accessible feminine side still not seen as relationship material?
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