A girl I dated back in HS just recently was able to get in touch with me via my parents. I called her back and we had a great conversation so we decided to go to lunch. We went to lunch and had multiple drinks and a great time. She told me that she has been with the same guy for 5 years. Afterwards she said that we should get together again soon and keep in touch. I want to take her out to a restaurant she really likes for happy hour and drinks, but am very confused about her intentions. I think she found out that I recently became single from her HS reunion.
Why would she track me down after 11 years if she is in a relationship?
Should I call her and ask her out again, or wait to hear from her?
I'm really confused right now, as I would love to develop a relationship with her, but not sure how I should take things.
Don't. She has a boyfriend and keeping intouch with her is totally pointless. I have no idea why she'd reach out to you after so long - But I DO smell trouble. Do yourself a favour and tell her that you're not into dating women who are married or in a long term relationship (even though you ARE interested, tell her you're not) as NO good can come of it. Think of her husband, possibly children are involved as well. Who knows what she's not told you about her life.
Totally understand where you are coming from. Thank you for the wise words.
However, during our conversation it sounded as if her relationship is going
no-where. Should I wait and see if she tries to contact me again, or wait a couple of weeks and contact her to make good on us getting together again "soon"
Do girls typically do with with guys they dated a long time ago? She said she went to her HS reunion and had a conversation about me with a mutual friend.
Last edited by neversummer69; 21st July 2008 at 6:55 PM.
Reason: question
"Sounded like"...Doesn't mean it is. She could be having problems, but she shouldn't be looking and talking to other men. If she is having problems, they need to sort it out or break up. Did she say her relationship was going nowhere or did she imply that? Or is that wishful thinking on your behalf? Don't be that guy... The OM (other man)...
A girl I dated back in HS just recently was able to get in touch with me via my parents. I called her back and we had a great conversation so we decided to go to lunch. We went to lunch and had multiple drinks and a great time. She told me that she has been with the same guy for 5 years. Afterwards she said that we should get together again soon and keep in touch. I want to take her out to a restaurant she really likes for happy hour and drinks, but am very confused about her intentions. I think she found out that I recently became single from her HS reunion.
Why would she track me down after 11 years if she is in a relationship?
Should I call her and ask her out again, or wait to hear from her?
I'm really confused right now, as I would love to develop a relationship with her, but not sure how I should take things.
In all likelihood it's completely innocent, she spoke about you with an old friend at a HS reunion and thought she'd make contact again. That kind of thing happens all the time and she's probably satisfied her curiosity and is happy to leave it for the next 11 years when she'll again be interested in an update. If she meant anything more by it, she'd have let you know.
Damn you people with all your common sense and logic. What everyone has said makes perfect sense. Why couldn't you have just lied to me and told me that she is interested in me and that I should pursue. LOL
I guess I'll just sit back and let her drive for a while. I guess you never know...
Why couldn't you have just lied to me and told me that she is interested in me and that I should pursue.
I'd have to say she IS interested...and do not pursue...and do not sit back all passively waiting to be her plaything, either .
What exactly her interest is, is the mystery. Has she been secretly pining for your for past 11 years? Has she tagged you as "good enough" to help her make the break from current B/F as effortless and painless for her, as possible?
I agree with poster who said to get in touch and say you are not interested in developing anything with someone in her position. Perhaps also that you'd like to hear from her when she is unencumbered and available to be pursued.
Good luck -- I do like a happy ending, so rooting for you that it will ultimately turn out to be a 'grand romance'
__________________
"They always say that time changes things, but you actually have to change them yourself." ~ Andy Warhol
Well as difficult as it is. Without knowing in full detail the reasons for our little encounter and her intention, I have decided not to contact her. If she is really that interested she'll find away to contact me again. Thanks for everyones thoughts, tips, and advice.
If she does call, I think I'm going to keep things really casual and if we decide to meet up again, I'm just going to make sure it is in a social setting with a couple of mutual friends.
If you met up and it feels like she is interested just ask her what the story is....that it seems like she is interested in you
If she says she is interested, let her know you are not as long as she is involved with someone....if she is single then that is a different story provided you are interested in her.
Please note: The suggestions and advice offered on this web site are opinions only and are not to be used in the place of professional psychological counseling or medical advice. If you or someone close to you is currently in crisis or in an emergency situation, contact your local law enforcement agency or emergency number.
.
Linear Mode
