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Long-Distance Relationships Coping with geographical distance can make or break a LDR. Share your experiences and questions here.

Old 27th June 2008, 1:47 AM   #1
babycheeks
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:( LDR troubles

Was with my bf for 5 years LDR, and around February he broke off with me because I was basically having a lot of money problems and I kept having to ask him for help and it was running his pockets low to the point it was causing him trouble.. he claims I didnt care about him and his finance issues and i just kept taking and taking.. but i just didnt have a lot of options at the time I was trying to finish college and my finances were hard for me to maintain on a low income job. So that ended it.. but we were still talking after the break up and i would ask him how he feels about me and he would say he still loves me and he will consider us etc.. so I kept hopeing that something good would happen and we would get back together. Then recently I was on a social networking site and I saw a comment he made for a girl back in 2007 and it said hey hot girl in front of me should i stay or run? Do you want to go on a date at all? and this really hurt me.. I asked him and confronted him about it of course he got all upset over it and said i was out prying for things to just get at him for when im the reason we broke up and not him, and i told him how the comment hurt me and that clearly he didnt respect me in 2007, and he said well you lost respect long ago when you kept taking and taking and putting me into trouble. He was just throwing the same old stuff on me about the finances and how i put him in trouble and he was saying if i want to make a comment to my friend i can, i can say whatever i want to say.. and i was going but it really hurt me and he was just going on about how he can do what he wants. Anyways in the end of it.. i said so u dont respect me or care or any of that he said u lost that long ago when u decided to keep repeating mistakes over and over again i gave u a lot of chances and u didnt take heed to them. So i basically just said well just live ur life then what more can be done and hung up. What is going on?
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Old 27th June 2008, 2:42 AM   #2
Nevermind
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Okay..it is easier to read posts, if they are spaced and use punctuation.

So. You were asking him for money constantly. He broke up, you maintained contact. You still asked him for validation. Then you see one comment that he made a year ago.

What are the mistakes he is referring to?

My view: writing to a girl while being with you isn't nice, but if it's the only thing he did, you're overreacting. He sounds very defensive, and blaming you for finances is low -especially since it didn't keep him from keeping the contact. But: You broke up 4 months ago. Giving him drama will only push him away. You have a reason to be upset, but you're not together anymore, so he isn't obliged to give you closure.

Maybe you should stop talking so much and just live your own life, as you suggested to him?
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