[nora28]

i and my boyfriend just celebrated our one year anniversary. in that one year, there were fights that are mostly about trust. this happened as there was once my bf told me a lie by telling me that he went out with his guy friend. after a few days, i found out that he went out with another girl the whole day. i was really frustrated and heartbroken. i wanted to leave him but i knew i still love him very much. he regreted for what he did and told me it will never happen again and give him a chance. so i did. but the problem with me is that now i cant give my full trust to him like i used to. now, whenever he goes out, i'd call to check on him. i became so afraid as i do not want to get hurt again. im just afraid it'd happen again. but he always tells me that he wont do it again. he told me that he loves me. i believe him for that part but giving him that space he wish i could give to him like i used to makes me feel uneasy. i love him i really do. and i know i have to trust him but i need my time to start gaining my trust to him.
as time goes by, one day my bf got so angry or myb dissapointed in me. he cant do this if i dont trust him. now, we have a problem. both of us are not speaking to eachother. not because we x love eachother but.. i dont know.. sometimes he made me feel like he actually doesnt love me.. i dont know what to do.. i was sulking the other day. he tried to call me but i turn off my phone coz he made me feel so sad. then he stopped looking for me. it's been almost 2 days now. i dont want this to end. but im not sure what i am suppose to do. currently, im just doing my things without him. i tried to call him lastnight but he didnt pick up.
so help me. how do i gain my trust for him. i really wanna fix and justify my realationship. i love him with all my heart.