Hey everyone. I am hoping you can shed some light on this for me.
I am a music teacher and I am currently dating the other music teacher from my work. It has been about a month since we started dating. It started with us going out for drinks to being in a relationship. I really really like this guy. We have so much in common and he has such a good head on his shoulders. I see myself being with him for a long time. He seems like the type of guy I could marry.
Lately, I've even been feeling as though I am falling in love with him. I know it seems too soon, but everything about this guy just feels so right. I've never felt like this before about anyone. I have been in love many times and was almost engaged to my last boyfriend. Maybe it is because I am older now and know what I want from someone.
The only question I have is that do you guys think it is totally crazy to date someone from work? He only works part-time, so I usually only see him for about 15 minutes in the morning before class. I don't feel as though I am smothered or anything. We always keep it really professional and never show affection at work.
Do you think we should keep it a secret to avoid gossip? I know there is no rule against office dating in my workplace, but should I talk to a union representative about the situation for some additional advice? What do you think?
Just do what ever you feel like. If you only see him for 15 minutes before class and you really want to be able to kiss him or hold his hand then just go ahead and do it. But if you start doing this stuff you do run the risk of grossing people out. (I hate watching public displays of affection) If you dont want to kiss and hold hands at school but just want to tell people you guys are dating, that should be fine to. But this whole situations of working with your bf who you only see for like 15 mins before class really sounds like a non problem, congratulations on being in love
Obviously KMT has not worked in a professional environment because 'just giving him a kiss if you want to' at work is not acceptable behavior.
Keep seeing him, but how is his provider potential if he only works part time? Does he have another job?
You don't want to be the primary breadearner.
honestly, i find my best relationships start from my workplace (i work in restaurants so theres a good amount of good looking gals to pick and choose from). It's not really a good idea to be PDA crazy with a co-worker/partner b/c its a distraction for others (gossip/rumors) and its not professional. But i feel that the people from work are more honest because they are not surrounded by their really close friends, nor are they always in the best of moods (not many people are when they go to work). I would just say that its best to keep it as it is, because as long as it isn't being a distraction, then its not a problem.
__________________ silence is the loudest parting word you never say
I don't think it's crazy at all -- my parents worked together their entire married life (tho they didn't meet there.)
If there is no policy against it, I would not bring it up with Union rep. What type of information do you feel may be missing in your decision to be in the relationship?
I'm also not sure that there will be "gossip" -- why would others talk negatively about the two of you just because you're dating? OTOH, if you don't want them talking at all, then yes, keep it quiet for now.
__________________
"They always say that time changes things, but you actually have to change them yourself." ~ Andy Warhol
An exbf of mine (my son's teacher) refused to date any of the teachers in his school. He did that once and he hated the gossip from other teachers and the students. He said it was even more uncomfortable when they still had to see each other when the relationship didn't work out.
But he's a very private person, so maybe the gossip won't bother you.
__________________ Expectations are premeditated resentments
This is pretty common. My third grade teacher married my the art teacher. There were 2 married teacher couples when I was in Jr High, and my music teacher started dating and ended up marrying a special needs teacher. One of the couples went through a divorce, and that's the only time I heard about much gossip going around... As long as it's not one of your students, I think you're OK! (Also had that happen, they married and still are!)
__________________
When you were yourself it tasted sweet
But it sours into a routine deceit
Well this drama is a bore
And I don't want to play no more - Third Eye Blind
An exbf of mine (my son's teacher) refused to date any of the teachers in his school. He did that once and he hated the gossip from other teachers and the students. He said it was even more uncomfortable when they still had to see each other when the relationship didn't work out.
But he's a very private person, so maybe the gossip won't bother you.
Yes, my husband is a teacher and dated a fellow teacher once. He broke up with her so it was kind of strained between them at school the rest of the year. She moved on to another school the next year though.
Obviously KMT has not worked in a professional environment because 'just giving him a kiss if you want to' at work is not acceptable behavior.
Keep seeing him, but how is his provider potential if he only works part time? Does he have another job?
You don't want to be the primary breadearner.
Yes, I agree on the whole "no kissing at work" idea. He works part time because he has another job. He chose to teach part time because of it. He actually makes more money than me so no worries there!
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