Do you let your parents know how much money you make?
For all you grown adult folks who live in your own, do you get insulted and offended if your parents try to pry or guess how much money you make? Is it natural for them to be inquisitive about this? Do you let them know? Do you get offended or do you not care at all if they ask/pry/guess?
Personally I get really offended and annoyed and I find it rude as well. I am just wondering how others feel.
I feel like if they pry and guess low it's insulting and if they guess high it's like patronizing. It's none of their biz anyways. just curious what others think??
Last edited by cutegirl; 29th December 2007 at 9:42 PM..
Yes, I tell my parents how much I make when they ask. They don't ask often. In reality, I tell them anything they want to know. If I have any questions about them, I also feel free to ask and they will answer.
Yes, I tell my parents how much I make when they ask. They don't ask often. In reality, I tell them anything they want to know. If I have any questions about them, I also feel free to ask and they will answer.
I am just curious to know how come you're so easygoing and don't get irritated? I'm trying to be nice to my parents here, so that's why I'm asking. It's hard for me though because I get irritated easily. You don't find it kind of rude and nosy for them to be asking things like this?? Especially if you're an adult?
Personally it kind of makes my blood boil but I'm trying to fight it.
If I know other people don't get irritated about this issue then it's easier for me to try not to be irritated as well and try to put it aside. I'm just wondering WHY others don't get irritated by these types of questions.
Last edited by cutegirl; 29th December 2007 at 9:47 PM..
I am just curious to know how come you're so easygoing and don't get irritated? I'm trying to be nice to my parents here, so that's why I'm asking. It's hard for me though because I get irritated easily. You don't find it kind of rude and nosy for them to be asking things like this?? Especially if you're an adult?
Personally it kind of makes my blood boil but I'm trying to fight it.
If I know other people don't get irritated about this issue then it's easier for me to try not to be irritated as well and try to put it aside. I'm just wondering WHY others don't get irritated by these types of questions.
I wish I had the answer to why we both take it different ways. I have a very open relationship with my parents. I love, trust and respect them and they reciprocate it. We did have a few battles when I was a teenager and had to push them back so they would accept that I wasn't a child anymore but since then, things have worked out. It doesn't mean we never argue about things but we resolve them very quickly, adult-to-adult.
If I recall, you moved out pretty quickly, as a younger person. Perhaps if you'd stayed, you might have worked it out? I don't have the answers.
It's hard for me though because I get irritated easily.
I'd tell him if he asked, but then again, he knows that I expect him to be as honest and open with him, too! Actually my mom was that way, too, so I guess I got lucky with my parents, because they trust me.
but I totally get the irritation factor, and somewhere I read how to divert the question by asking, "Why is it important to you to know?" It puts the burden on the other person by making them fess up why the hell they're being so nosy, and it does work.
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[B] "Why is it important to you to know?" It puts the burden on the other person by making them fess up why the hell they're being so nosy, and it does work.
Oh, I did ask this already. And my dad said "Ohh it's cause the place you live in cost xx amount, so I just thought that you probably such and such amount. Usually I my own rent is 3x my income"... That's what my dad said to me in response.... Well that's the MINIMUM most places require in terms of income when you move in, but that does not mean that if your rent is XX amount, that you automatically make 3 times XX. It could be more too, I could be 4x higher, or 5x. Point is that if I don't tell he doesn't know. Either way it's no one's business. He didn't ask how much I made, he just said "is it over XX" and then the next day he was like "oh it's probably between x-and x" (which he estimated wrong btw)...
Anyways it's just annoying to me. I think I'll ask him later how much he makes and see what he says. I don't think he would care though.
I wish I had the answer to why we both take it different ways. I have a very open relationship with my parents. I love, trust and respect them and they reciprocate it. We did have a few battles when I was a teenager and had to push them back so they would accept that I wasn't a child anymore but since then, things have worked out. It doesn't mean we never argue about things but we resolve them very quickly, adult-to-adult.
If I recall, you moved out pretty quickly, as a younger person. Perhaps if you'd stayed, you might have worked it out? I don't have the answers.
I guess it's cause financial issues are a very personal matter. I suppose if a stranger asks you about your income you would be offended but not parents obviously cause their family and you're close to them...
I was 18 when I moved out, I don't think that's really that young. A lot of kids move out at that age.
Also, this topic isn't about my mother, who I have had problems with, it's about my dad (although my mom does pry about stuff like that too). I guess they both do.
I guess it's cause financial issues are a very personal matter. I suppose if a stranger asks you about your income you would be offended but not parents obviously cause their family and you're close to them...
Exactly. I don't even tell close friends about how much I make or what I'm worth. My parents, I'll pretty much tell them anything.
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I was 18 when I moved out, I don't think that's really that young. A lot of kids move out at that age.
It wasn't a criticism, just an observation. While 18 isn't unusual, it is pretty young, if you think about how much you've changed since that time. Essentially, your parents would have still been viewing you as a teenager.
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Also, this topic isn't about my mother, who I have had problems with, it's about my dad (although my mom does pry about stuff like that too). I guess they both do.
I have no problem with my mother asking, she did after I got my new job, and I told her. She said she was proud of me for being so well paid for someone my age. That was the end of it.
My dad and my sister asked and I didn't answer. Said I didn't feel comfortable with that question and changed the subject.
Obviously I have a much better relationship with my mum. My dad and my sister, whenever they ask me something, I always think they have the worst intentions. They probably do. I feel especially uncomfortable after my grandmother told me my dad was accessing my bank account details when I had an account with the credit union he works for. Why? Who knows. Cos he doesn't know when to keep his nose out of my business.
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My parents know almost everything about my financial status, income but not the income net taxes. The family friend who happens to be our family accountant knows my net income due to tax filings.
My parents just want to know because they are parents. I think they are just curious and quite frankly want to be parenting their kid!
My parents know almost everything about my financial status, income but not the income net taxes. The family friend who happens to be our family accountant knows my net income due to tax filings.
My parents just want to know because they are parents. I think they are just curious and quite frankly want to be parenting their kid!
So, do you let them know the approximate range you make? They don't have the dollar amount but they can guess the range right?
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