That my father treats me the same as he does my sister? He moved to another state last December and we have spoken all of 4 times since. And all because I have called him. He has not offered for me to come visit him, he has made it quite clear his new wife is his family, and my sister and brother come into that family But I DON'T.
He speaks to my sister every single day. Because I talk to her, they gossip about me behind my back, what I am up to, if I have stuffed up, what my boyfriend is like etc etc. My father has been quite rude to my boyfriend. He ignores him whenever they have met, and I have been with him for 3 years. When I informed him I was moving in with my bf, my father kicked up a stink. I made it quite clear his opinion was not warranted and he has no say in my life whatsoever. After I moved in with my mother when they divorced, I probably saw my father all of 5 times in about 6 years. And they were only because I went to my grandmothers for Christmas. So no, he has no right to say what he thinks I can or can't do.
BTW I had a bank account with the bank my father works for. I was recently informed by my grandmother that my dad has been monitoring my savings (obviously without my consent). What in the hell gives him the right to do that? The only thing stopping me from reporting him and having him fired are my brother and my grandmother, who would be hurt by me doing this. I changed my bank account with somewhere else though.
I literally count myself as not having an actual father. hence why I never call this idiot Dad, he just isn't my "Dad" anymore. When I eventually marry, he will be sorely surprised when I ask either my Grandfather or my brother to walk me down the aisle.
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I have a similar family background. My sister stayed with my mom post D, I moved in with dad. I have a zero relationship with mom... my sister has close to a zero with my dad.
I have to say.... my sister is a living trainwreck! So my thought is this. Does your father feel like you chose your mom over him in the divorce?
Well I lived with my father for about a year after the divorce. He did not provide a stable home, he was always angry and so I left. I always had the feeling my father only wanted custody to get back at my mum. And the fact he is now trying to get my mum to take my little brother so he can enjoy his life with his actual family says alot.
I was 12 when my parents divorced. Even if he was hurt by me leaving, I was a kid who missed her mum. He needs to grow up if he still isn't over it.
Shucks that sounds kinda bad! Your Dad really needs to pull his head out of his arse. On one level he seems to have expectations for you... so that shows he cares. However, he isnt actually bieng a good father.
How is your Step-mom? Is there a chance she is driving some of this behavior towards you?
Shucks that sounds kinda bad! Your Dad really needs to pull his head out of his arse. On one level he seems to have expectations for you... so that shows he cares. However, he isnt actually bieng a good father.
How is your Step-mom? Is there a chance she is driving some of this behavior towards you?
Well she is about 10 years older then I am, and frankly she doesn't want to have anything to do with me or my sister. The only times we have spoken in person was after they married and I hugged her and told her how glad I was she makes my father happy. Other then that, it has been a few words here and there. She has no interest to get to know my fathers children, I think she is intimidated by my sister and I, possibly because of our ages? My brother lives with them and apparently they barely even speak...
I'm sorry to hear about your relationship with your dad.
But at least you acknowledge that this is one relationship that you can do without, right? Honestly, who needs an ass like that in their life anyway? I personally wouldn't give this man the time of day (he clearly does not what it means to be a father).
How is your boyfriend handling all of this? Is he supportive?
Well she is about 10 years older then I am, and frankly she doesn't want to have anything to do with me or my sister. The only times we have spoken in person was after they married and I hugged her and told her how glad I was she makes my father happy. Other then that, it has been a few words here and there. She has no interest to get to know my fathers children, I think she is intimidated by my sister and I, possibly because of our ages? My brother lives with them and apparently they barely even speak...
Coco, I think this might be a big part of your problem. You have a wicked step mom. I have no idea how to fix this... It's a horrible situation. The worst part is that your dad is going to do everything possible to hang on to her, even to the point of alienating you, which I doubt he undestands that he is doing.
I got lucky when my dad found a lady that has a huge heart. Otherwise I basically wouldnt have parents.
Your situation straight up blows! Try not to resent your dad too much.
Is there a way you can get to know your step mom a little better???
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