[mpo26]

Hi I'm looking for some advice on a situation which has occurred recently. I'm pretty sure I've been fair but I'd like some feedback.

I first met this girl back in April and everything was great. I travelled miles to see her and took her on dates 4 times. We used to speak on the phone and text all the time and everything was great. But then it all dried up and contact went from daily to weekly, and there was a whole month where I heard nothing from her for no reason, except her saying she had a lot to deal with.

With this lack of communication, other than recent short chats on MSN, I had decided to give up on seeing her anymore. I should mention she always knew I was interested and even three weeks ago I asked her out again just in case she wanted to try again.

Since then I met another lovely girl and we've really hit it off. So much in common, we laugh all the time, love each others company and are attracted to each other. Communication is great too. Me and this girl have decided to give things a go and continue seeing each other.

This has led to the first girl accusing me of being fickle and giving up on her. She claims I obviously didn't like her that much if I could move on so quickly. But it's been months now and she hardly communicated to me how she was feeling. Someone can't just ignore you for that length of time and then criticise me for seeing someone new surely? I'll be honest I really wanted to be with her but I felt like I was fighting a losing battle and decided to move on. Basically we argued about it on MSN and she's now deleted me.

Can somebody reassure me I've done nothing wrong because she's making me feel awful and I'm really enjoying seeing the new girl I'm with. It's not like I didn't give her a chance. I couldn't wait forever without her saying anything could I?

[LoveLace]

You have done nothing wrong. You can't expect someone to let a month go without questioning why you haven't been in touch--not in a relationship anyway. AND you said you asked her out again, so you made your effort.

You seem pretty happy with your new girlfriend, so I say stick to it. Tell girl #1 you are sorry but you just found a relationship that is fulfilling for you, and obviously #1 didn't make you feel that way. Perhaps she was attempting to play hard-to-get and it back fired on her. Her fault!

[D&L]

Coming from a woman, let me assure you, you have done nothing wrong. One thing with woman, this my not be for all, but for many, though we may not like a person the way they do us, we still want them to want us even though we do not reciprocate those same feelings. It's just seems to me that she is now no longer being chased and she's feeling a little left out in the cold. You have found someone new, and this old girl is starting to feel a little jealous. If I was her, I would have been thinking, "So he says he likes me but yet, one little sign that things may not be going smoothly, he's ready to give up. Am I not worth it then?"

Just like children, they may have a toy and not want it anymore and dont play with it, but as soon as someone else wants this toy, all of a sudden, its their favourite toy.......... I hop it's making sense to you....ITS NOT YOUR FAULT.

[lino]

I'm a guy who hates all this chasing, playing hard to get, game s**t & I personally feel you handled this in the best way possible & have done nothing wrong. Hopefully this knocked her on her a** & made her realise she should cut that crap out & appreciate a good thing when she has it.
I hope one day I'll get to do the same thing.

Cheers.

[jcster]

You didn't do anything wrong - don't let her guilt you into playing her game.