[a81688]

Okay. Well I had asked for bf for a break 2 weeks ago. We argued a bit and almost did break up.. But I just asked him for some time apart. Since I was spending all my time 24/7 with him and I never had any time on my own.

Well Tuesday he asked me to lunch and we got back together and maybe I just assumed that things would be back to normal.. since we never really discussed it. And I havent had time to talk to him since, cause he has been busy with work.

I always go to his job on Thursday and spend the night with him. Its been like that for the longest.
So today I ended up working, and when I got off I called and told him I was on my way to his house cause I was too tired to go to his job. (I have to take 3 buses to go to his job).
And he asked "Why are you going over there?" and seemed like he didnt want me to go visit him. He had to get back to work and hung up saying he'd call back.
Yeah he didnt so I ended up coming home instead.

I just dont understand why he did that. He never has before..In fact he usually calls me to make sure I am on my way. I dont get this?

[Lizzie60]

Originally Posted by a81688

Okay. Well I had asked for bf for a break 2 weeks ago. We argued a bit and almost did break up.. But I just asked him for some time apart. Since I was spending all my time 24/7 with him and I never had any time on my own.

Well Tuesday he asked me to lunch and we got back together and maybe I just assumed that things would be back to normal.. since we never really discussed it. And I havent had time to talk to him since, cause he has been busy with work.

I always go to his job on Thursday and spend the night with him. Its been like that for the longest.
So today I ended up working, and when I got off I called and told him I was on my way to his house cause I was too tired to go to his job. (I have to take 3 buses to go to his job).
And he asked "Why are you going over there?" and seemed like he didnt want me to go visit him. He had to get back to work and hung up saying he'd call back.
Yeah he didnt so I ended up coming home instead.

I just dont understand why he did that. He never has before..In fact he usually calls me to make sure I am on my way. I dont get this?

I noticed two huge mistakes from what I read:

First:

Since I was spending all my time 24/7 with him and I never had any time on my own.

Why is that?... even if you're living with him, you got to take 'me' time... this is crucial... and that goes for him too.

Secondly:

I just assumed that things would be back to normal.. since we never really discussed it.

Don't assume everything is OK if you don't discuss issues that made you want to take a break... He probably has the impression, you just took holidays... but it's not a vacation.. you need to talk about your problems before you get back together....

Now he's acting up... but since you aren't opened about your problems... he might be acting up because he's still angry at you... who knows?

Key is communication... without it.. it's a dead end.

[a81688]

Yes. I know. I mean I love being with him, but I was spending every minute with him.. and it was stressing me out.
And it was always him calling me to go see him. and always him planning me to spend time with him at his job and what not.

This is why I told him I needed a break and I couldnt be with him all the time.
I suppose he could be mad or could assume I am still on a 'break' or whatever..
I guess I should talk to him, but he's been busy for the past 2 days..
And Im just upset and hurt because we always hang out on my days off. And the excuse he gave me when I asked why he didnt want me to go to see him was that he was tired from work and that he was gonna go straight home and sleep (he has a party of 150 coming to his job tommorow). But I dont know, that seems like BS to me.

[Lizzie60]

Originally Posted by a81688

Yes. I know. I mean I love being with him, but I was spending every minute with him.. and it was stressing me out.
And it was always him calling me to go see him. and always him planning me to spend time with him at his job and what not.

This is why I told him I needed a break and I couldnt be with him all the time.
I suppose he could be mad or could assume I am still on a 'break' or whatever..
I guess I should talk to him, but he's been busy for the past 2 days..
And Im just upset and hurt because we always hang out on my days off. And the excuse he gave me when I asked why he didnt want me to go to see him was that he was tired from work and that he was gonna go straight home and sleep (he has a party of 150 coming to his job tommorow). But I dont know, that seems like BS to me.

I would write down everything that is bothering me... then discuss 'your list' with him...

If you don't talk.. nothing will be solved ever. From what I read... you don't discuss things... you ask questions... then he is on the defensive... and will give you excuse...

You need to really address the issues that are bothering and damaging your relationship.

Good luck.

[a81688]

Hey thanks for the reply. And the advice.

I wanted to say that actually I ended up making plans to go out with his best friend (who is gay if that makes a difference =p) and when he went to go pick me up.. guess who was in the car? My bf.. LOL
I dont know why he decided to come along anyways.. even after he told everyone (not just me apparently) that he was gonna go straight home and sleep. And I was surprised beacuse my friend didnt tell me he was coming and my bf didnt call or anything. But we had fun and I even spent the night with him.

I think I will write him a note anyways.. just a small letter saying that I know we just got back together a few days ago.. but I that I still want to spend time with him and that I wish we would talk more often.

=)