Not invited to xmas party..another slap in the face
Long story short I work at the most toxic workplace possibly in creation with people always leaving. I took this job after college bc it was the only one offered to me and I needed some substantial work on my resume. Low and behold I've been there a year a a hlaf, passed over 4 times for a promotion, and bascially am vegating and taking up space at my job. I've been looking for a new one since the summer. I get no respect and the higher ups only talk to me only when they need something done. I'm the office gopher and pretty much given no work. So then there's the gossiping, rumors and vicious ones too about people having sex etc and the 2 phoney gossips number 1 and 2. They are nice to my face and everyone elses then they'll go in their offices or whisper on the phone and lie, gossip, make fun or and try to sabatoge others in my office. So my office has a client xmas party. Last year was my first year and me, the recpetionist and another worker (who I know people didn't like) weren't invited. I was told the girl before me was. So here it is year 2 and today in work the 2 gossips were whispering the whole day as usual and very standoffish with me...even though I did nothing to them. but I got the vibe that something was going on. So everyones prancing around in their outfits for the party when I found out the end of the day..I WAS THE ONLY PERSON NOT INVITED..besides my bosses secretary who don't like parties lol. It's clear that I'm bascially **** at my office but I would figure my boss would at least have the respect to not leave out one person. I come in, do my work, have never gotten in a fight with anyone so their reason for not liking me..I don't know. The biggest kicker is a worker whose only been there a month and whose last day is tomorrow and even the new receptionist got invited and went. So while she went to the party..I covered the phones. I then had another coworker say to me "oh why that's a big **** u in the face how were u not invited and the receptionist was". Well of course it is. From day one I got a bad vibe from this place and never partook in the rumors and gossip which is 95%of the day..and of course being an attractive girl caused the catty comments to always be made. I also must add that I'm the lowest paid person too. So after almost crying at my desk I made the decision that I may not even go into work tom and come Monday I'm givng no 2 weeks notice and just not going back. I guess this will be my BIG F U TO THEM!! I know it's right before xmas but I feel like staying after this would make me look like even a bigger smuck then I do now. Am I doing the right thing bc I can't take it anymore?
I am all about the big F U. However, I have never NOT offered two weeks notice because I was always worried that it would reflect badly if that employer was called as a reference for a new job. And you mentioned that you don't have much to put on your resume.
I think what your employer and coworkers did was inexcusable and downright mean, but I'm not sure a future employer would see it an excuse for giving no notice. If there is something illegal, or dangerous (a safety issue) I think you could get away with no notice being given, so if you can think of a plausible excuse to explain it to a future employer, go for it if you have the ability to lie well. Unfortunately, I don't.
Maybe if you give notice, they will tell you to just be on your merry way! I had that happen twice and was paid for the two weeks! Some companies have an attitude that if you don't want to work there anymore, you could be bad for business (usually this is when business involves personal or financial information about customers.)
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Pain is inevitable; suffering is optional (Zen aphorism)
Sanity before everything. If you would be given a flame-thrower for Christmas, I know what you would be doing ... so don't
and give your notice. I am assuming though that your college degree will give you a good shot at the jobmarket.
our office xmas party is next week though..(THE CLIENT ONE WAS TONIGHT) so you mean I'm supposed give me 2 weeks monday, go to this office garthing, slap on a happy face and pretend what he did wasn't obsurd?
I am all about the big F U. However, I have never NOT offered two weeks notice because I was always worried that it would reflect badly if that employer was called as a reference for a new job. And you mentioned that you don't have much to put on your resume.
I think what your employer and coworkers did was inexcusable and downright mean, but I'm not sure a future employer would see it an excuse for giving no notice. If there is something illegal, or dangerous (a safety issue) I think you could get away with no notice being given, so if you can think of a plausible excuse to explain it to a future employer, go for it if you have the ability to lie well. Unfortunately, I don't.
Maybe if you give notice, they will tell you to just be on your merry way! I had that happen twice and was paid for the two weeks! Some companies have an attitude that if you don't want to work there anymore, you could be bad for business (usually this is when business involves personal or financial information about customers.)
no, they will make you work your 2 weeks. Thing is the party tonight was the client party..next week is the office christmas one which I already told them I was going to...How do I know go into work tom when I pretty much don't want to look at any of them? And when should I give my notice?
If you are going to be too miserable, don't give the notice. InsanityImpaired did say sanity before everything. Then work on your effective lying in case a prospective employer asks why you didn't give notice. Give me some more details about the job, workplace, etc. and I'll come up with a plausible whopper, but it will be your job to sell it
If you are going to be too miserable, don't give the notice. InsanityImpaired did say sanity before everything. Then work on your effective lying in case a prospective employer asks why you didn't give notice. Give me some more details about the job, workplace, etc. and I'll come up with a plausible whopper, but it will be your job to sell it
is this letting them win..I mean you think they'll get why I quit lol. I don't know I just can't belive what a $$$$ my boss was and for no reason.
Just keep your performance at a professional level. I know, it sucks, and you'd rather leave this moment rather than tomorrow. You can't walk out of the job, if you want to get some reference from your current employer.
As dropdeadlegs suggested, in some companies, even crappy ones, it is usual that when someone gives notice, that they don't have to work the 2 weeks at all. So there is a chance you could avoid the office X-mas party.
But if you are required to work the two weeks, that would lead to an awkward situation. I am afraid you would have to suck it up, as the reference would be quite important for you.
If you've been looking for a job since last summer and haven't found one, then maybe quitting isn't the way to go. How much savings do you have? If you have trouble finding a new job, how long can you afford to be out of work and pay your rent and bills?
At the very least, you've got at least a couple paid days off coming to you for Christmas Day and New Year's Day. Why don't you wait to give notice until the after the holidays are over, so you can take full advantage of the paid days off?
If you've already left in your head, then they are powerless to hurt you. The worst that could happen is they fire you - and then you'd be able to collect unemployment - so just go in there, hold your head high, and ignore whatever gossip and comments are sent your way.
Better yet, go to the office party and charm your company's boss and the upper managers. They probably have no idea who you are...maybe you'll want a recommendation from one of them for your next job.
is this letting them win..I mean you think they'll get why I quit lol. I don't know I just can't belive what a $$$$ my boss was and for no reason.
Who wins??? Who cares? I can believe anything based on the "toxicity" level you posted.
Quote:
Originally Posted by InsanityImpaired
Just keep your performance at a professional level. I know, it sucks, and you'd rather leave this moment rather than tomorrow. You can't walk out of the job, if you want to get some reference from your current employer.
As dropdeadlegs suggested, in some companies, even crappy ones, it is usual that when someone gives notice, that they don't have to work the 2 weeks at all. So there is a chance you could avoid the office X-mas party.
But if you are required to work the two weeks, that would lead to an awkward situation. I am afraid you would have to suck it up, as the reference would be quite important for you.
Personally that would be MY action, but I'm not you and I don't work there. My sanity is pretty important to me. Remember my offer to cook up a half baked lie for the future....
Quote:
Originally Posted by norajane
If you've been looking for a job since last summer and haven't found one, then maybe quitting isn't the way to go. How much savings do you have? If you have trouble finding a new job, how long can you afford to be out of work and pay your rent and bills?
At the very least, you've got at least a couple paid days off coming to you for Christmas Day and New Year's Day. Why don't you wait to give notice until the after the holidays are over, so you can take full advantage of the paid days off?
If you've already left in your head, then they are powerless to hurt you. The worst that could happen is they fire you - and then you'd be able to collect unemployment - so just go in there, hold your head high, and ignore whatever gossip and comments are sent your way.
Better yet, go to the office party and charm your company's boss and the upper managers. They probably have no idea who you are...maybe you'll want a recommendation from one of them for your next job.
Norajane says a lot of things that make good sense. How bad could two weeks be considering there should be some time off in there? I also wanted to ask about your financial situation. I rarely could afford to just up and quit, but I did it twice anyway (with notice) and managed to survive. Looking for a job full time is easier than trying to find work while actually holding down a full time job. At my last job, the two weeks was difficult, but knowing there was an end in sight I made it through them.
Isolating a person in the workplace and excluding them from social events is well recognised form of bullying. It's astounding that people behave in such a way in the workplace, but sadly they sometimes do. Workplace bullying is always a hot topic, those companies containing the worst examples of it generally deny having a sort of bullying problem within their organisation and like to attribute blame for problems they do recognise to those who are being targeted.
If a senior person is trying to bully you out of a workplace, it's generally best to start looking for something else....but take back a bit of power in the way you do that. However sh*tty and nasty your company might be towards staff, it has to put a positive spin on itself in order to promote its services to other companies. Use your remaining time in the company to figure out what factors make it attractive to other businesses, then visit a career counsellor armed with that info so that you can get some advice as to how you can use those factors to promote you to other businesses.
You mustn't take away confidential information, but there's nothing to prevent you from compiling a list of useful resources, addresses, names and contacts - and generally becoming a mine of useful information about that particular industry.
This is why, when employees hand in their notice, they're often cold shouldered and encouraged to take garden leave...so it's best to plan your departure a bit, not simply leave in the heat of the moment - and certainly don't give them any clues that you're planning to go. Concentrate on using your remaining time there to build up as large a knowledge as you can about that particular industry. Every time you're set a task, think about what it is you're doing and how you can (in future interviews) sell the experience you gain from performing that task.
The more focused you are on using this job to build up your CV into something more impressive, the less you'll be bothered by the crappy politics that are going on around you. It certainly does sound as if you need to get out of there....but make sure you don't leave empty-handed.
Please note: The suggestions and advice offered on this web site are opinions only and are not to be used in the place of professional psychological counseling or medical advice. If you or someone close to you is currently in crisis or in an emergency situation, contact your local law enforcement agency or emergency number.
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