[JohnHesse]

I thought it was going away, now i'm confused again.
My ex broke up with me about 8 months ago.

I was pretty devastated when it first happened, but i've been slowly getting my life back together, started dating, etc.
I still find myself thinking about her all the time. Its not that i think about getting back together with her, but the good times we had, and what it feels like to be with someone you really like.

We have a lot of mutual friends in common, and last week, one of those friends invited me to her party at a bar downtown. My buddy and I (who she knows well) went, and of course i run into her and her new bf. I'd been dreading the encounter for a while.
I did most of the talking with our mutual friend. I could tell she wanted to talk to me, but her new bf was there. i walked to the bathroom, and she followed me there. we chatted for a while and just caught up on what we were up to. She asks me how i felt about hanging out with her once in a while, said she could help me with some projects, etc. i have no illusions that its anything more then that she wants to be my friend, and probably alittle curious about what ive been up to. i told her i don't know how i feel about that.

I'm just conflicted. I don't want to be friends with her, it would just be too awkward for me. I think the only way to get over someone is to not see them, so her question about hanging out is a no no.

but i can't stop thinking about her. The emotional part of the breakup is pretty much over. but how do i get her out of my head?

[InspectHerGadget]

Unfortunately unless you stop seeing her all together she probably won’t be out of you head completely for awhile… I agree with the hanging out being a nono. If you really gotta get her outta there, best way is to fill her spot up with a new girl!

[notmakingsense]

That's the million-dollar question, isn't it? I don't think anyone has a magical answer for that. Personally, I think the answer lies in either (a) falling in love with someone else, or (b) falling in love with your own life's pursuits. Most of are in between somewhere, so we think about the past good times when our minds aren't fully in the present.

Keeping contact to a minimum is a really good idea. Focus on getting out as much as you can, having fun and keep up the dating.

[JohnHesse]

and full disclosure, of course i still have feelings for her, and in the back of my mind still wonder if she'll ever change her feelings about me.

she was very charismatic and fun to be with, and i feel that i miss that part of her that isnt so easily replaced. At the same time, i know she cant be fully trusted because she's flaky.

I know that the only way to get over someone like that is to find someone new. ive been dating for the last 6 months, no one special.

Its just not that easy finding someone i really like (as least if i had someone i really liked, it would be something to shoot for), and one of the reasons i have such a hard time getting her out of my head.