Could anyone give me some advice on relationships with some serious religious differences? My girlfriend (who is wonderful, by the way) is a devout and practicing Christian, while I am an atheist. Obviously, this is a bigger problem for her than it is for me. We've decided to stay together, but I'm wondering if this is a recipe for disaster. If it weren't for the fact that, aside from this, we seem perfect for each other, then I would call it off. But neither of us really want to do that, and meanwhile we are having a wonderful time.

Help!

[Tony T]

It will take incredible maturity to keep this together but it can be done. If, however, she is a very devout Christian and her religion is deeply important to her, it will eventually cause problems and REAL BIG ONES.

Right now while everything else is great and holding up the relationship, she's probably not paying a whole lot of attention to this issue. If the two of you got to the point of talking marriage, I promise you if she doesn't thing of the issues, others will advise her and then the problems will set in.

Right now, you could discuss this with her until she was blue in the face and your religious views wouldn't make any difference because the relationship isn't at a phase where it would.

There is no reason that two highly rational people of different religious views can't have a great relationship if there is incredible respect for each other's feelings on the subject. But one day, when she wants to get married in a church and she knows you won't make vows to a God you don't believe in, things will begin to crumble.

Take things one day at a time and just see where this goes. As she gets older, the relgious thing will be less important to her. If she is over 35, you are getting into sort of safe territory. Under that, watch out. A lot of devout Christians are pretty steadfast in their beliefs. I would bet all the chips on the table that in the back of her mind she is thinking her undying love for you will eventually convert you to a believer.

My last relationship broke up for religious reasons. She worshipped money...and I didn't have a dime.

I know you wrote this message because you want some advice, but I'm in the same situation, and I don't know what to do either. It seems to get more frustrating by the day. Mariage is a possibility but the potential problems could doom us. I'm curious on how you try and handle the situation.

Please write back

Thank you

Could anyone give me some advice on relationships with some serious religious differences? My girlfriend (who is wonderful, by the way) is a devout and practicing Christian, while I am an atheist. Obviously, this is a bigger problem for her than it is for me. We've decided to stay together, but I'm wondering if this is a recipe for disaster. If it weren't for the fact that, aside from this, we seem perfect for each other, then I would call it off. But neither of us really want to do that, and meanwhile we are having a wonderful time. Help!