[PWSX3]

Ann if you have been holding back, buried that night then that could be a LOT of the problem.
You really need to get professional help to get that figured out.

I had an affair on my former W 20 years ago, it took me until our divorce 20 years later & going to a good Christian counselor to figure out why I did it. I though it was because I wasn't getting what I needed from my W, but it was because of my past & something happening then that made me feel like I needed something else.

I do understand how you feel, it has to be hard to be in a relationship that you feel no love for, but what if both of you worked on it together to make it different??

Check out Henry Clouds/John Townsends web site or check out Steve Arterburn's web site. They are Christian based so I guess if you aren't a believer it might not help, but it won't hurt. Might just give you a different view of things.

In my Divorce Care classes there were two gals that left there marriage & even though it was what they wanted to do (both had some abuse in there marriage) they seemed to have the worse time of dealing with the divorce and that is why they were in the class.