[delnoire]

Originally Posted by sally4sara

IDK, if the kid is so close to both men and both men act like supportive fathers and SHE actually wanted to change her name (not one parent wearing her down to it)- all the better for her rather than feeling like a traitor to both.

And why is it the concept would bother you because it is her step father's name, but most men expect a woman to change her surname upon marriage?

I would never expect my SO to change their name after marriage. If they wanted to thats fine, but its really not that important to me whether they keep their last name or change it.

But a daughter is different. Shes flesh and blood. I'm just speaking my own opinion here and being a guy, i guess I'm just territorial, but my bio daughter is mine, not the guy who is married to the mother.

Would I want my bio daughter and her stepfather to have a great, wonderful, caring relationship? of course. But if she was calling him daddy and wanting to have his last name....I would be extremely upset and insecure and jealous.

I guess I would just want to have a special place in my daughters heart because I was her bio dad and if she changed her name from my last name to his, I would feel like I was getting evicted from that special place, and the stepdad was moving in.