As far as I'm concerned, after all these years of trial and tribulation, everything that makes our relationships work, or not work, can be boiled down to one thing: our values. Look, education, career, hobbies, all of these are important, but they take a back seat to the things that we value as people. It is on the basis of what we value that we prioritize our lives and conduct ourselves in the social arena. It is by these same values that we reveal ourselves, our TRUE selves to the people around us so that they may determine wheter they wish to be friend us, and vice versa. Some of you younger out there may not agree, I suppose, but when you've been through the obstacle course of life a few times, there is no denying it: we are all defined by that which we value.

Totally agree! Our values and morales determine the choices we make in life at any given point.

[Tony T]

YOU WRITE: "there is no denying it: we are all defined by that which we value."

I don't think we are completely defined by that which we value. However, if we don't value ourselves sufficiently to make sure the world doesn't crush us, we are certainly in trouble.

Human beings are not static. What we value today may not be so important tomorrow. What we appear to value today may not be what we appear to value tomorrow. Therefore we are more clearly defined by our ability to govern ourselves according to that which is important to us in the present and the character qualities we possess in the present. We are constantly growing and changing for the times.

There are many qualities in many humans that can remain dormant for long periods of time. For instance, there are many who could not be defined as patriots, generous humanitarians, heros, or as having empathy, sympathy, love for fellow men, etc. until after September 11, 2001 (the attack on the WTC in NY).

Very often, it's the moments, both joyous and tragic, both personal and public, and how we react to them that truly define each of us.